“Youwhat?”
Skyler holds up his hands. “I didn’t start it, I swear! Remember how Tumblr was still big when we were in the band? Sometimes I’d scroll through the Blue Skies hashtag when I was bored or needed something to cheer me up.”
Trevor frowns, not understanding where he’s going with this, and also hating the thought of Skyler needing to be cheered up and not coming to him. That was probably whenever they were fighting.
Skyler sets the magazine beside him on the couch and angles himself more toward Trevor, letting his knee press into Trevor’s thigh. “People posted all sorts of things about us, including disturbingly realistic photoshopped pics of us half naked in compromising positions.”
“Jesus.”
“Right. Anyway, someone anonymously posted a picture with a date to this popular blog, claiming it was real.”
“Was it?” Trevor asks. They’d always tried to be careful, aware of the way they behaved around each other in public. But there had to be plenty of times when they’d messed up and someone could have caught them. It wasn’t easy keeping things looking platonic when they’d been so in love.
Skyler shakes his head. “It was only of the backs of us, but it was clearly a picture of a wedding ceremony.”
Of a…
What the hell?
Skyler eyes him nervously but continues. “And people were arguing with each other over whether or not it was photoshopped, and I…” He pauses, looking uncertain.
Trevor sighs, not sure he wants to hear what comes next but knowing he probably should. “It’s okay, you can tell me.”
“Well, Layla had tweeted on that same date, ‘Today’s the big day!’ I don’t even remember what she was actually talking about, but I took a screenshot and sent it to the blog. I thought it would be funny. But the fans ran with it, digging into our friends’ and our families’ social media, trying to track down everyone’s whereabouts on that day and looking for more evidence. Suddenly so many people were convinced it was true. That we got married.”
Skyler ducks his head when he’s finished, and Trevor has to remind himself to breathe, to not get upset. They’d already had enough people watching them and enough speculation without Skyler adding to it for fun. Skyler did a lot of things back then without thinking of the consequences, and it wasn’t fair how Trevor always felt like he needed to be the responsible one.
But Skyler’s shrinking in on himself now, twisting his fingers together and pinching at the skin between his thumb and forefinger, and Trevor hates to see him like this. He itches to reach out and touch him, offer some comfort.
And this regression to the awkward, fidgety version of Skyler makes it easy to recognize how much he’s changed. Trevor loved him when he was just becoming an adult, and he loves him even more now that he’s matured into the most incredible man he’s ever known. So confident and sure of himself, while still so kind and generous and thoughtful, that it’s a little overwhelming to be around him sometimes.
Trevor can’t punish him for something he did so long ago, so he does reach out, separating Skyler’s hands to take each of them in his own. He squeezes once reassuringly, and says, “It’s not really your fault. Clearly the fans wanted so badly to believe that. I don’t understand why you’d fuel the rumor, but what’s done is done.”
When Skyler finally looks up at him, his eyes are wet with held back tears. But then his demeanor shifts into something less guilty and more vulnerable. “Maybe I wanted it to be true as much as they did.”
Andoh.
Wow.
That’s—Wow.Okay.
The air between them is heavy as Trevor fails to respond.
He imagines Skyler, alone in a hotel room in some random part of the world, waiting for Trevor to get back from an outing with Sierra, maybe. Imagines him on his laptop, legs tucked under the covers, scrolling through all those photos of the two of them. He imagines Skyler seeing that photoshopped image of their wedding, thinking about them getting married, and wanting it.
Wow.
It's not like Trevor never thought about it back then. He did. They even had their future lives all mapped out. But they were so young and doing so much with the band that they barely had time to breathe. So whenever he thought about marrying Skyler, it was never an immediate plan. It was only awouldn’t that be nice. Amaybe someday.
“Are you sure you’re not mad?” Skyler finally asks, his soft voice gently tugging Trevor back to the present.
He shakes his head. “We can forget about it. Let’s eat our salads before they get… colder.”
Skyler gives him a curious look, like he wants to press him further, but then he nods and stands, offering Trevor a hand to pull him up. And it’s good thathe doesn’t press, because Trevor isn’t mad, but he’s something. He’s just not sure what.
He’s still in a bit of a daze as they sit side by side at the breakfast bar eating their food in a contemplative quiet. He picks all the chunks of goat cheese out of his salad and dumps them on top of Skyler’s. He could have asked for the salad without it, but he knows how much Skyler loves the nasty stuff. Skyler smiles gratefully at the gesture and rubs his thumb briefly along Trevor’s thigh. In response, Trevor swivels his chair so he can rest one foot on the bar underneath Skyler’s.
They’re fine.
