Sometimes the actors chat with members of the crowd, or babies get attention (on my pro list for considering pregnancy in the very distant future), but I’ve never seen someone singled out by name. Hopefully it’s because they’ve discovered that Charlie Chamberlain hasn’t watched an episode ofVampire Fallssince he swapped the show for protein shakes and want to expose him for the fraud that he is, and not because he was in the right place at the right time and just happened to save our favourite cast member’s life.
I remember clearly the day Charlie Chamberlain’s mum dropped him off at mine so she could take Sadie to ballet. I wish I couldn’t, but I can. It’s our origin story, I guess. He shuffled in on crutches, his leg in plaster from a bad break after falling out of a tree, and he’d used so much deodorant I could taste it in the back of my throat. He was a gangly fourteen-year-old then;his shoulders hadn’t filled out and he was all Adam’s apple and angry spots. I believe he would have been called a hobbledehoy back in the day, fact fans, but I was still struck by his smile.
I was kind of nervously excited, waiting for him to arrive. Our mums had met at a baby group years before, and we’d shared a birthday party once when we were pre-schoolers. Fairies and Cowboys. He actually chose fairies, and I chose cowboys. We were progressive in that way. But then we sort of drifted at primary school when he decided girls were gross.
He was nervous and polite, and I was bolshy and territorial (I know; hard to imagine, right?). We had no friends or classes in common so just sat in silence staring at the TV until my mum came in.
“Charlie, can you manage in here with your leg? Or would you rather eat at the table?”
“Here’s fine,” he said, his voice squeaking in that unpredictable teenage boy way.
“Good.” My mum’s face brightened. “We normally watch the latestVampire Fallsepisode on a Thursday. Do you watch it, Charlie?”
Charlie shook his head and glanced at me. I could see the discomfort in his eyes – probably the thought of eating a meal cooked by someone else in an unfamiliar house and now having to sit through a TV show he had zero interest in.
“It’s kind of our little tradition, isn’t it, Eliza?”
I nodded, squirming on the sofa as my mum revealed to Charlie that I actually enjoyed spending time with her. I mean,lame. She disappeared back into the kitchen while I lined up the latest episode ofVampire Falls.
“So, what’s it about?” he asked.
“Vampires,” I said, without looking at him.
“Right,” he said, shifting on the sofa. “Helpful.”
Mum brought Charlie’s dinner in on a tray. His face lit upwhen he saw the massive plate of breadcrumb coated chicken, chips and peas, and my mum handed him the ketchup.
He smiled and drenched his chips in sauce, then I pressed play and he politely watched the pre-credit scene, his eyebrows pinching together as he tried to work out which of the two characters fighting was the vampire. Next thing, the intro music kicked in and he watched each actor’s sequence, his eyes brightening when he saw Amber Anderson.
“Who’s she?” he asked.
“That’s Juliana the Demon Huntress,” Mum explained. “An undead warrior from the Megna dimension. Her mother was murdered by vampires. She hates everything about this world, apart from heavy metal.”
Mum pulled the metal sign with her fingers then did a little air guitar riff as Charlie Chamberlain blinked at her. Amazingly, I didn’t die of embarrassment. He swallowed down a chip, then cleared his throat.
“Is . . . she in every episode?”
“She first appeared at the end of season one but was so popular they made her a series regular in season two,” Mum clarified.
He nodded and looked back at the TV, frowning again as he attempted to follow the storyline. He was hooked by the end of that episode, and that week he came over after school every day to watch it from the first episode. We’d watched the entire first season by Sadie’s next ballet lesson.
The audience looks around, even Roxy, trying to spot the mysteriousbrotherof Damon Van Schwartz. I do not move, my back pressed to my chair as tightly as my jaw is clenched.
“He’s here!” shouts a very loud, very proud, voice. “Over here!”
“Sadie, honey, is that you?” says Damon Van Schwartz.
“Y-yes!”
“Can you bring up that hero brother of yours?”
“Y-yes!” she manages.
The crowd erupts like Charlie Chamberlain has the chance to win a million dollars. I mean, it would feel like winning a million dollars, being invited onto the stage by Damon Van Schwartz. Not that I’m jealous. Not that I’m at all bothered by what Charlie Chamberlain does. He could trip over on the top step, fall over and smash his perfect teeth for all I care.
Roxy elbows me and I look round, horrified to see her clapping and smiling as Sadie drags Charlie towards the stage. I glare at her, and she rolls her eyes.
“Come on, ice queen. This is cool. Look how excited Sadie is.”
