“Stop— it. You don’t need to defend or protect your mom and sister. I already think they’re great. Just take the compliment. You do workreallyhard. It’s impressive.”
“Oh... well... okay—thank you. I’m not good atcompliments either. They make me feel like I’m in the spotlight. I like to be the one working behind the scenes. When my school had a play, I always signed up for stage crew.”
“And let me guess—your sister was the star?”
“Of course; she was born for the spotlight”
“You’re not jealous of her, are you?”
“Not at all. I love seeing Annie shine.”
“I get that. I have no desire to be the center of attention. My problem with my mom and my grandpa is they never understood that I don’t want to be a star. Not to say I was a slacker or anything. I did all right in school.”
“And according to Brandon, you were a star athlete.”
I shrug. “That didn’t impress my mom much. But my dad loved it. He and my stepmom came to nearly every game.”
“They sound really nice.”
“They are. It’s funny—my mom and grandpa blame my dad for my lack of ambition. But in my mind, he’s a huge success. He coaches high school football and teaches history for a living. But if you were to hear my mom or grandpa talk about him, you’d think he was living in his parents’ basement, addicted to video games.”
“A high school history teacher is an important job.”
“It is. And his students love him.”
“Do you see him often?”
“At least once a month. They live in Santa Rosa. I have a younger half brother, Robbie, and a half sister, Fran.”
“You should have them come to Norland Park—before you ruin it,” she adds with sass. And I love, love, love that she’s willing to tease me about this now. It definitely breaks the tension.
“Have you ever considered that our plans for the park might be an improvement?”
“I considered the remote possibility. And then I met yourboss,” she deadpans. I can’t help but laugh. “I get not wanting to be a CEO,” she continues, “believe me, I do. But if I had a boss like Lucinda, I would want to strike out on my own.”
“She’s not that bad.”
Elinor gives me a you’ve-got-to-be-kidding look. And I cave.
“Fine, she is that bad. But she can’t be that much worse to work with than my grandpa.”
“He was all bark and no bite. I kind of miss him.”
“You do?” I say with some surprise.
She nods. “It’s been weird without his weekly phone calls where he grumbles at me for how I’m ‘spending his hard-earned money.’”
“I had my own weekly phone calls with him.” My grandpa used to call me every week to ensure that I didn’t decline into squalid middle-class contentment. Somehow, it was easier with him than with my mom to understand that what he was really trying to tell me—with all his unsolicited advice and criticism—was that he loved me. “I miss those calls,” I say, staring at the remnants of the nachos.
She reaches across the table and pats my hand. At her touch, my eyes lock with hers, and I deliberately clasp her hand.
She was remarkably quick in the discovery of attachments. —Sense and Sensibility
20
Elinor
Edward’s holding my hand. It’s such a small thing—but it’s not. My heart is thundering. Does the fact that I’m letting him mean that I’ve forgiven him? I don’t know. Tonight has been surprisingly fun. Of course, I shouldn’t be surprised that Edward and I could talk for hours. Getting along with him has never been my problem. The problem is trusting him. But I’m still holding his hand because I don’t want to let go.
