“The cost of living here is too high, and I got a teaching job in Ames.”
The ground is falling out from under me. There are no words for my disappointment. My eyes sting.
“Don’t go,” I speak urgently. “Please!”
She looks sick. I feel sick.
“Liam, we hardly know each other. There’s no reason for me to stay.”
“Lie to me all you want, Lettie. But don’t lie to yourself. You like me. And I... I really like you.”
“You’re wrong. I don’t... I don’t know if I like you... I’m attracted to you. I can’t help that. But I understand I’m not the only one.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“Don’t think I haven’t heard the stories—you dating every pretty employee. Making them feel beautiful and desired, promising them a future with you, then dumping them as soon as you get what you want.”
She may as well have slapped me. “Where did you hear this?”
“Are you saying it’s not true?’
“Lettie, you’re the closest to an employee that I’ve ever dated, and I waited until you were no longer under contract. Where did you get this idea?”
“Noah Whittaker. He said he was fired when he filed a complaint about you dating an employee.”
Noah Whittaker. That explains the distrust in her eyes. I can only imagine the sort of stories he would tell her.
“Noah Whittaker is a lying scumbag! You can’t believe him or trust him.”
“That’s what he said about you.”
“So this is what you think about me? That I’m a player and a womanizer?”
She hesitates. “I... I... don’t know. You did kiss me when technically you were still on a date with Caroline.”
“I did.” I run my hands through my hair in frustration. “You didn’t seem too worried about that last night.”
“I was swept up in the moment. But you see why I have concerns?”
“Honestly? No, I don’t. I’ve made my interest clear from the start.” Lettie stares at me, her pretty mouth slightly ajar. “And then we fought, and we made up. And ... ”
“How do I know you don’t say the same things to all your dates?”
“Ask Charlie. He can tell you it’s been more than a year since my last girlfriend. And I can categorically promise I’ve never been as wild about anyone as I am about you.”
“So, what am I supposed to do? Stay in an apartment I can’t afford because you’re crazy about me?”
“Yes! That would be a start,” I say with a huge sense of relief. “I’d be happy to cover your rent.”
“No! Liam! I can’t take a penny from you or from anyone. You’ve got to see that. I can’t change my life plans because Imightlike you. Just a few days ago, I half-hated you. Our first date was a disaster. And last night... ” She looks down at her hand in mine. “It’s hard for me to know who to believe. I want to believe you.”
“Then do. Lettie, believe me when I say I care about you.”
She stares at me, her eyes wide and full of uncertainty. We sit so close on the bench, that the side of her lower thigh touches mine. As if pulled by gravity, our bodies sway together. In a flash, Lettie’s lips are on mine. Her hand reaches up to the back of my head, guiding me to her. I return her kiss, desperate to show her how much I care, how much I need her. I can’t think of her leaving. Not now, not when we are just beginning to see how good we could be together.
With each kiss, I’m begging, pleading, “Stay! Lettie, stay! I want to bake you macarons for breakfast every day. Whenever someone says something ridiculous, I want to catch your eye and share a secret smile. I want to have rip-roaring fights with you over pop culture. And then kiss and makeup forever and ever.” But I’m not getting through to her. All her bittersweet kisses say the same thing—goodbye, goodbye. She pulls away, her cheeks wet with tears. And I know I’ve lost her.
“No... we can’t... Liam, don’t confuse me. I’ve made up my mind.” I see the steel settle in her soul. There’s no point arguing. But I still try.
