“Not so bad,” Elias replies noncommittally, attention rapt on his work rather than anyone’s face. “But they’re always so touchy-feely.” He shudders and the triplets’ faces contort into matching grimaces of disgust that make me fight a snort.
“Gross,” Kinsley commiserates and I bite my lip at the hypocrisy.
I start scooping handfuls of the slimy guts out, swiping a spoon and continuing with my head down as the brothers all start falling into easier conversation. As much as I want things to be alright between the two of us, that’s something that can’t be forced and will hopefully develop over time. For now, I’m just happy to see him bonding with his brothers again and enjoying being here despite my presence.
“So, did they figure out how to fix you yet?” he suddenly asks and my hand stills, not expecting him to initiate any direct conversation.
Kinsley pipes up to start protesting, but Kahl tosses a glob of pumpkin guts in his direction to shut him up before things start escalating. I meet Eli’s condemning gaze unflinchingly, shocking the hell out of myself. His sharp words miss the mark; this last week or so I’ve come to terms with everything happening even more than I realized. I don’t need his approval, or anyone’s really. I know in my gut that I belong here, it’s just a matter of finding a way to coexist without such open animosity on his end.
“Getting there.” Shrugging, I go back to scooping the last of the seeds out. “The cold blooded development is a hard adjustment though. Amazing the little things you take for granted. Wouldn’t be surprised if my organs started bursting like confetti bombs at this point.” I can feel his eyes on me as I reach over Kahl to grab a marker and start sketching out my lines before carving.
“Yeah, the newbloods are the same way now; always glued to my sister like their personal heater.” He stabs into his pumpkin a little harder, continuing, “But I guess that means this is exactly where you should be.” Another stab. “World’s pretty shitty, so this is the safest place for you right now. Not like you’d survive the winter in the middle of the woods if even your own blood’s turned against you.”
His words surprise the hell out of me, and I promptly realize all of my prior experience with teenagers doesn’t apply to this kid. Just as soon as I think I have a read on him, he pulls the rug out from beneath my feet before I can gain solid footing. We carry on in awkward silence for a long stretch, working on our jack-o-lanterns until I finally can’t take it anymore.
“So we get to go through dragon puberty together. That’s fun.”
Just kill me now.
His face mirrors my inner horror and Kahl nudges my shoulder, snickering. “Keep up the good work,” he mock-whispers behind his hand and I shove him back, pumpkin slime coating his arm.
Hastily sawing away, I’m beyond grateful for something to keep my hands busy and an excuse not to look anyone in the eye. “I just mean, well...”
The pressure in the base of my skull builds, forcing me to grit my teeth until it lessens. Huffing in frustration, I slap my blade back down. When my dragon’s agitated presence recedes, I finally continue, not wanting to lash out in my discomfort.
“I’d like to stay as long as you’ll all have me.”
May as well just throw it all out there, no longer having the patience to pussyfoot around the topic with my building headache, though I desperately want this to go well. I just don’t think avoiding the elephant in the room is going to get us there.
“And I don’t want to chase you out of your own home. Is there something I can do to make this mess easier on you? Because I don’t want to drive a wedge between you and your family, but I’m also not planning on going anywhere unless they throw me out. Maybe we can meet in the middle somewhere?”
He tilts his head to the side, assessing me silently for the longest time before glancing at his phone and sighing in defeat. Setting his pumpkin aside, he gets to his feet, walking over and crouching in front of me. Kahl stiffens at my side, and I hate that he thinks he might have to intervene.
He doesn’t stretch out his hand, just keeps his unyielding gaze on my face. “Those people manage to find you here, are you going to run again? Let us buy you time so you can escape before they drag you back?”
My breath hitches in my chest until I feel like I’m suffocating, an endless list of horrors rapidly flitting through my mind at what might be waiting for me. After the havoc the Veles family and Ezra’s mates brought down on the lab, destroying what they could, there’s no doubt in my mind that the men that escaped will take more precautions next time. If I get dragged back, especially when they realize the success they managed with me?
They’ll never take the chains off again.
“No.” My voice comes out as barely more than a whisper. “Because if they track me here, they can find me anywhere. There’s nowhere safe to run anymore and nowhere left to hide. I’ll slit my own throat before being forced to step a foot outside of Hadeon.”
The triplets explode in a litany of objections, voices rising with their anger, but I don’t focus on their words. I keep my attention solely focused on Eli’s face in front of me as he nods to himself, stretching out a slime covered hand in offering that I hesitantly accept, expecting it to be a trap. “It takes more than blood to be a dragon, Saige. But maybe try to slit their throats first instead? Fates, girls are so dramatic.” He winks to lessen the jab and I huff out a strangled laugh as he gets to his feet, turning to his brothers.
“I’m going to go grab some more of my stuff before I head out. Still probably best if I give you guys some room for a while until things settle down a bit.” He heads to the kitchen to wash his hands before going upstairs.
The guys have settled down at this point, and I turn to look at Kahl, biting my bottom lip as I war with the optimistic feeling attempting to overrule my typically cynical self. “Even though it wasn’t that long of a visit, I think it went far better than expected, right? He’s not ducking out just to get away?”
The corner of his lip twitches as he gives me a small smile that makes my stomach flip. “Of course he is, but it’s just because he doesn’t like talking about this sort of stuff.”
Internally sighing in relief, I get to my feet and head into the bathroom to wash my hands, things seeming a little less impossible. A second later, Kaiden starts cursing up a storm and I go running into the kitchen to see water spraying everywhere.
“GODS DAMN IT, ELI!” he roars, sputtering and getting thoroughly soaked.
There’s a heavy thump from upstairs that makes the walls shake and I share a look with the other two before we bolt for the stairs. My brief respite of fear is gone in a blink, trying to remember the last time we did a scan that all of the windows were still locked. I know none of the others would have just opened them randomly downstairs where someone could hear us or easily break into the house, but what about upstairs where it’s unlikely?
Fuck, what if someone tries to use Eli as a hostage? How the hell can I not go with someone if they threaten to kill him, or one of the guys? Would I really be able to kill myself to opt out of a decision like that, leaving them to try and fight their way free of that mess?
I wouldn’t be able to even have that, the control over my own death. The ghosts of those men still have the power to take away my choices, will haunt me until I go mad or die, won’t they? They don’t even need chains to make sure I can never be truly free.
