“Maybe there is,” I toss out there optimistically, desperately wanting to believe there’s somewhere she can run to, somewhere she can make a life. “They’d keep it hidden from dragons, so it’s not like we’d be aware of its existence.”
Kaiden’s quiet, keeping his guard up and making sure no one sneaks up on us. His eyes flick over to her on multiple occasions, and each time he does, his features harden just a bit more. I’m able to watch as my brother desperately tries to bolster his defenses, tries to protect himself from the pain we all know is coming in a few hours.
“Yeah, maybe,” Kahl agrees, but his heart isn’t in it. It’s lying between us, about to be ripped away for good.
Our conversation tapers off as we all get lost in our own heads, no one really in the mood to talk. I don’t even realize I’m doing it, running my fingers through her hair absentmindedly, only noticing when she starts to wake up. I quickly retract my hand, going stock still.
Shit, she’s going to freak out waking up on my lap. I should have slid the duffel bag under her instead, what was I thinking? Stupid and careless.
Her bright blue eyes meet mine, flashing with momentary alarm before calming down. It’s just enough to make me feel like shit, apologizing profusely as I start to move. I’m obviously a glutton for punishment, because I can almost swear I see a flash of reluctance pass over her features before she sits up, but I know that’s just wishful thinking.
“Sorry,” she mumbles, getting to her feet.
I get up, wincing when it’s clear my leg is asleep and tingling painfully. “No, you’re fine. Trust me.”
She digs for a water bottle and I watch her force herself to stop, to ration it. Since she came to stay with us, she’s nearly always drinking, her throat bugging her. That, or she’s not used to steady access to clean water, I’m not sure.
Running is going to make that worse. What if there aren’t any rivers nearby? It’s not like she can just use someone’s hose, that would be too risky.
Goddamn it.
The awkward silence is suffocating, but Kahl clears his throat to try and get things on track before we do something stupid. “You ever shoot before?”
Saige bites her lip. “A couple times, but it was years ago. It’ll come back to me though, don’t worry. I’m just rusty.”
Kaiden curses, but Kahl keeps his cool, digging the gun out of the bag. He methodically goes over everything, making sure she understands the purpose of each part in case there’s ever a glitch. We don’t want to give away our position or waste what little ammo she has, so he keeps the safety on instead of letting her practice. He comes in close behind her to adjust her stance, nearly plastered to her back as he makes sure her aim is spot on.
She doesn’t lock up and freeze like I imagined she would, but actually seems to relax. Hope, the painful thing, rears its ugly head despite my best efforts to stuff it back down. Her mind is set on leaving, so I need to stop being an idiot and accept it already. It’s just going to make everything harder than it already is otherwise.
When he’s done, she changes back into her jeans and Kaiden helps strap weapons to various spots, though it’s clear he’d rather drag her back home with us instead.
“How’d you guys track me?” she finally asks. “So I don’t make the same mistakes and give myself away.”
Kahl explains and she frowns, because it’s clear there isn’t anything she can do about her presence. Instinctually, you always know if you’re surrounded by something dangerous or something you can sink your teeth into. I have an idea though, whether or not it will actually work. But I figure anything that could be used as a leg up is worth trying when all of the cards are already stacked against us.
“I don’t know if it would work, but we could try scent marking you. It might help to mask what you are for a while, confuse people.”
Really, I’ve only seen animals do it and have no clue if it would apply to us or not. It’s not like we have superhuman senses, not like humans have a unique smell that sets them apart. It’s just our cursed blood, deciding our fates before we’re even born.
She blinks up at me. “Golden showers aren’t really my thing. I mean, I appreciate all you guys have gone through for me, but I think I’m going to pass on this one.”
Kahl snorts as I laugh. “I’m not talking about peeing on you.” I shake my head in amusement. “It’s more like adding our scent to yours,” I continue rambling nervously, rubbing the back of my neck awkwardly. “So that you give off a different air. It won’t be like anyone would mistake you for a dragon, but it might help cover the vulnerable vibe you give off.”
Kaiden’s eyebrow rises as he mulls it over, getting on board with the idea. “Like a bear cub. You know you could overpower it, but doing so would bring down the wrath of its parents, so people steer clear.”
Kahl shrugs. “Or an injured wolf you just stay away from, knowing there’s likely a pack nearby. Not a bad idea, Kins,” he praises, but Saige looks incredibly uncomfortable.
“So, how would something like that work?” she asks, not meeting my eye.
I wait until she looks up at me before answering. “Nothing bad, I promise. Trust me?”
I don’t know what possess me to say those stupid words, because she obviously doesn’t if she’s ditching our asses. But a pathetic part of me desperately craves to hear it, wants me to be wrong. It wouldn’t change anything, might even make things worse, but I can’t call the words back now that they’re out there.
She releases a long, slow breath, then nods. I swallow, heart hammering, and open my arms. “Okay then, come here.”
Tentatively, she steps forward, relaxing against me as soon as I wrap my arms around her. The tension dissipates from my muscles as I lay my cheek on the top of her head, nuzzling. Stupid? Maybe, but fuck, it feels amazing. Even if the entire idea ends up being a crock of shit, this right here? Having her wrapped in my arms, the sweet scent of her skin surrounding me? It feelsright.
I don’t know how long we stand there like that, but Kaiden ends up stealing her from me to give her the same treatment when he grows sick of waiting. As soon as she’s pulled away, I’m left with a longing ache that’s no doubt here to stay. It brought a chair, popped a squat, and made itself at home for good. I don’t think I’ve ever wanted anything as much as I want her. Fuck, I’d gladly give up the prospect of shifting if it meant being able to stay by her side.
