I’m still alive. I survived.
And I’m determined to move forward.
My wounds are healing—one day at a time.
I met my first new friend.
Her name is Lorraine, and she’s older than me. A little bit of a busybody, but in a good way. I already like her and would love to meet some of the other people in the building. Maybe she can introduce me.
She said the man across the courtyard is Miles. I want to know what made him work on the outdoor space. It’s beautiful. Is it his job? Or a hobby?
How do I get a hobby?
Am I a person who likes art? Collecting ships in bottles? Do I love rock climbing? I want to find out.
I want a hobby. (Add to list.)
Maybe it’ll help me get to know myself better.
Chapter 4
One week later
I added another thing to my “What I Want” list.
It’s a biggie. It’s probably going to have its own list underneath it.
My “What I Want” list, so far, is—
I want a job or career I love.
I want friends. Real ones.
I want to live in a new city.
I want a dog.
I want to figure out who I am—apart from a wife and a mom.
I want a place where I fit in. I want a place where I belong.
I want a hobby.
And now, the last and latest one is...
I want to do the things that scare me.
When I wrote it, I wasn’t thinking of cliff diving in Acapulco, or lying in a coffin while arachnologists dump buckets of tarantulas on me.
I was thinking of simple things. Going out to dinner by myself. Striking up a conversation with a stranger. Trying new foods.
No big deal, right?
I’ve eaten alone before—unfortunately, it was junk food whilestalking. After everything that happened, I did everything I couldnotto be noticed.
Not anymore. Time to figure out what I want, and I’m hoping stepping out of my comfort zone will lead me there.
Or I’ll hate it.