Oh no.
“Don’t even think about it,” I mutter.
The sheep stares at me.
I stare back.
A silent challenge passes between us.
Then he charges.
Not at me.
At the lamb.
“No!” I shout, jumping out of my chair.
But the sheep is alarmingly fast for something built like a furry battering ram. He barrels straight toward the table, and purely on instinct—or perhaps a suicidal impulse, the jury’s still out—I launch myself at him.
Bad idea.
Very bad idea.
The sheep dodges with an agility that defies all known laws of ovine physics, and suddenly I’m scrambling onto the dining table to block his access to the lamb. My knees sink into the tablecloth, knocking over a glass of red wine that spills dangerously close to Callum.
“Mary!” Jane gasps, somewhere between horror and hysterical laughter.
“Can someone… maybe… help me?” I pant, clutching the serving platter.
But the sheep is determined. He plants his front hooves against the edge of the table and bites down on the chunk of meat that slid loose from the platter.
“Drop. It. Right now,” I growl through clenched teeth.
The sheep stares at me with what can only be described as pure contempt.
Then he pulls harder.
So do I.
“Help me!” I yell at my family.
We are now engaged in a full-blown tug-of-war, me on all fours atop the formal dining table while a deranged sheep battles me for possession of the roast lamb under the horrified gaze of my entire family.
“Mary,” Callum says dryly—still making absolutely no effort to help—“I didn’t realize veterinary medicine included Greco-Roman wrestling with the patients.”
“Oh, shut up, Callum.”
The sheep gives one final violent yank, the meat tears free, and he bolts triumphantly toward the door with his prize clenched in his jaws.
I remain frozen on all fours atop the table, breathless, hair falling out of its pins, meat juices staining my favorite sweater.
And that’s the precise moment another sheep appears in the doorway.
Hamish.
I recognize the legendary family sheep immediately—the one who attended every wedding, caused endless chaos, and seems to possess almost supernatural intelligence.
He surveys the scene.
