The relief in her eyes caused him heart burn.Ian gave her a tight smile before resuming the drive back to the main house, wondering if Fran had any heartburn medicine handy.
"Ian?"Lucy nudged him on the shoulder.
"What?"
"I was asking what kind of activities."
Had she?He hadn't been paying attention.He did a mental shake to clear his mind, telling himself he just needed sleep.Last night, today, everything he'd learned, it had thrown him off his game, off his goal.Time to regroup and get back on track."Fishing, archery, pony trekking, boating on the loch, bird watching… The pub in the village offers whisky tastings and we can arrange trips into the larger cities and help plan tours off the estate.Part of our land is a working farm, so we might add tours of that down the road.Dev's an amazing carpenter, so he'll keep things in shape, and Jamie has a degree in agriculture like my father did.Once we get the accommodations finished, he'll start running the farm."
Lucy digested his words with a serious nod."You guys are making a life here."
Ian thought about that for a minute."Yeah.I guess we are."
"What about your family in North Carolina?"
"My mom is happy we chose to keep Balmorie.She loves it here.But she'll never leave the farm back home.All her memories of us growing up, the house we lived in, memories of my father… It's all there.She has her brothers and sisters and my grandparents.They'll all come visit and we'll do the same."
"And now you have a place to host them all."
"That's the plan.So what would you like to do tomorrow?"
Lucy thought about it, a slight frown marring her features."I haven't done any of those things you mentioned before.Kind of sad when you think about it," she said more to herself than to him.
"Why sad?"
She shrugged."I don't know.Just been realizing lately I've missed out on a lot, you know?You get in ruts, forget you once had big plans to see things and do things.Well, maybe not forget ..."
"You mean talk yourself out of things, throw obstacles in your way?"
"Yeah," she answered, seeming surprised he got it.
"Everyone does it.My grandfather was big on no regrets, no dwelling on past mistakes, guilts, whatever.Always look forward, he'd say—though that was usually after he pissed off my grandmother and got into trouble.Point is, don't beat yourself up about it.You're here now.All those things you've never done," he said with a smile as he parked the Rover, "you're about to do."
Lucy sat on the terrace alone, admiring the view of the loch.The sun had set a few minutes before, leaving the sky streaked with brilliant orange and purple.The beauty made her chest feel tight.What an incredible place.What an amazing thing Ian was doing by keeping the castle and land in his family, and sharing it with others.It had been an emotional day.A strange one, too.Nothing was going as she'd expected, and she wasn't quite sure what would happen now.
Man, she'd been nervous to tell Fran and Hamish that she wasn't Riley.She'd tripped over her words, blushed furiously, and waited for the hate.But the hate never came.They told her 'never you mind', made her something to eat, said they had faith she'd do just as good a job as Riley would.And that was that.
It left her feeling a little dazed, like she was having an out of body experience.
They were good people.So was Ian.
And Lucy didn't feel like she deserved their understanding.
But then maybe that was just her throwing obstacles in her way again, making things seem harder than they were.She should stop second guessing, accept kindness, and move forward.Like Ian's grandfather had said.
Lucy hadn't seen Ian since he'd dropped her off at the castle.She wasn't sure she liked the sense of anticipation every footstep, every shutting door brought, the way her stomach went light and hopeful.
The sun had disappeared.The air grew chilly on the patio.Lucy drew the afghan around her to wait for the stars to appear and tried not to think of Ian.
Chapter 8
"Do you believe in love at first sight?"
"What?"Riley's voice came through the receiver in a harsh bark."What the hell is going on Lucy?"
Crap."Not what I meant," she hurried to revise the blurted-out question, wondering why the hell she said it in the first place."Not at first sight.More like after a day or two?"Oh, God.She had to stop.Her mouth had a mind of its own and was blubbering idiocy on a grand scale."Never mind."
"Did you meet someone?"
