Ada’s temper snapped. ‘Didn’t you? You asked me to leave my home, to make a life with you instead, to risk my life with you.’
‘You were the one who told me you weren’t going to see him again! You told me you chose me.’
‘I do choose you, Cam. Isn’t that obvious? I’m here with you, aren’t I?’
‘But it wasn’t enough. You still need him.’
Ada raised her chin, meeting Camille’s gaze.
‘Maybe. Do you still need James?’
Colour rose to Camille’s cheeks. ‘That was … a mistake, I didn’t mean for you to see us—’
Ada snorted. ‘That was obvious. Have you even told him about me?’
‘I was going to—’
Ada cut her off. ‘Do you know what hurts the most? You open up to him in a way you never do with me. He gets your vulnerability. You share parts of yourself you never share with me.’
‘That’s because he doesn’t scare me!’
Ada stared at her in shock. ‘I … scare you?’
‘It scares me how much I love you.’
‘You say that as if I’m supposed to think that’s a good thing. Jesus, Camille, are you serious? You think that’s a thing that would make me feel good to hear? I would never want you to be scared of me.’ For a moment, Ada thought she was going to burst into tears – but then anger won. ‘When your father was on trial – when I ran away from home for you – you said you’d told me everything. How your parents had been betrayed, falsely accused as traitors. That they were all you had.’
‘I didn’t lie to you. I didn’t mean to. It … felt like another lifetime, like none of it was real. His parents were friends with my parents and Georges Molyneux. We half-grew up together, before the Revolution… We weren’t going to get married until James came down from university.’ Camille licked her lips. ‘It might never have happened.’
Ada’s anger boiled over.
‘Do you love him?’
Camille’s expression didn’t falter.
‘I did. I thought I did.’
‘But do you still have feelings for him now?’
Ada asked the question even as she could feel her heart breaking.
Camille hesitated.
‘No.’
A silence, smooth and pearlescent, hung between them.
‘Too slow, Cam.’
Camille took a deep breath.
‘We don’t have time for this.’
‘I’m sorry my loving you is so inconvenient.’
‘That’s not what I meant and you know it.’
‘No. You meant you wanted the fight to be over so you decided it was. Just like that.’
