“Does Kiara know about any of this?” Emma asked.
Alexei shook his head. “No. I’m terrified to tell her. She thinks she loves me, but she doesn’t realize she never could, once she knows the truth. I’m too damaged.”
“That’s not true,” Emma insisted. “I know you’re scared, but you have to believe you two could have a future.”
“How?” Alexei asked dryly. “If the cult finds out I’m still alive, they’ll try to kill me, and they’d kill any mate I’m bonded to as well. I have too many enemies. Being with Kiara puts her at risk. It’s safer if she stays away.”
“I thought the same way about Emma, when I was working as the Phantom,” I told him. “But it didn’t do me much good to keep pushing her away. Fate made it so we couldn’t be apart.”
“Even if there wasn’t any danger involved, I’m just a broken man,” Alexei said. “I experienced so much abuse in the cult that it’s difficult to be open with anyone now, and I know you have to be open in order to be in a relationship. She’d get frustrated. And it’s not like we could ever be intimate. She’d be disgusted at the sight of me, you can be sure.”
“There are ways around that,” Emma insisted. “You can be intimate in a million different ways. Sex doesn’t have to be defined by one thing.”
“I’m certain I can’t give her any children. What kind of a life is that for a sorceress?” he asked.
“Children aren’t everything,” I told Alexei softly. “You know Emma can’t carry children, because of her condition. She told me that the night I asked her to be my mate, and I accepted it. Loving her was worth the loss of any offspring I might have. And I’m sure Kiara feels the same way about you.”
Emma gave me a fond look. Alexei didn’t reply, and Emma said, “Look. Relationships are hard, no matter how much baggage you do or don’t have. What makes it worth it is the decision to carry on. Ethan and I have been through so much together, but we’ve stuck through it, and it’s worth it. I’m sure you could have a happy life with Kiara, even with what’s in your past. But you have to give it a chance.”
Alexei’s jaw worked. He didn’t seem intent on giving us a response. He climbed down from the tree, and I jumped to the ground. Emma fluttered after us.
“Alexei, if you’re not going to open up to her, you at least need to let her go,” I told him softly. “It’s not fair to hold onto her when you aren’t going to fulfill any promises.”
Alexei looked back. His expression was a puzzle. Then he changed into a griffin, spread his wings, and took off into clouds.
It wasn’t long before he was out of sight.
Chapter Twelve
Emma
Alexei’s story had been heartbreaking. I couldn’t imagine that my friend had endured that much pain, especially as a child. I wished we could go back in time and reverse what had been done, but we had no such power. All we could do was continue to support him now.
I disagreed with his wish to conceal his history from Kiara. Those two were meant for each other, and I knew whatever Alexei had gone through, Kiara would understand. But fear ruled over Alexei, and I worried the two of them would never get to be together, with his dark past in the way.
I did what I could and gave Alexei space. He avoided us for a few days afterward. Kiara was wholly confused, but hid her angst behind a veil of anger.
“Just who does he think he is?” Kiara asked me as we walked to class. “The nerve of some people, I swear.”
She was ranting about what had happened in the grand ballroom again. She couldn’t let it go.
“Maybe there’s more to the story that you don’t know,” I hinted. “You could ask him—”
“I’m not askinghimanything,” Kiara growled. “As far as I’m concerned, I’m a free woman, and on the market. Ifhedoesn’t want to pick me up, I’m certain there’s someone who will.”
She stormed off in the direction of her Alchemy class. I sighed and turned into Professor Hemlock’s classroom for my Fae Bonds class. If she didn’t want to listen, I couldn’t make her.
I sat down beside my brother. He took this class with me, so we studied together often. “Hey,” I said lightly. “Do you know what we’re learning today?”
Arthur tapped his chin with his quill. “Um, I think it’s something about true names.”
True names? I wasn’t sure what that was. I sat down at my desk, and Professor Hemlock entered the room.
Hemlock’s daughter, Callista, was at the head of the classroom. She was casting illusion spells, making little tiny bubble animals that ran around the room. People laughed and popped the bubbles as they drifted by. I lifted my hand, and a miniature horse bubble landed on it, kicking and bucking before popping delightfully.
Hemlock sighed and said, “Callista, can you please stop this nonsense? We’re about to begin.”
Callista was nice, but she was a bit of a rebel. She and her mom fought all the time. Callista wrinkled her nose and said, “I’m just playing around, Mom. Gods.”
