I’m sittingcrisscross on Hunter’s bed as he finishes getting ready for bed, his pajama pants hanging low on his waist. It’s starting to hit me he’ll be leaving soon, and our days of spending every day together are numbered again.
I know it wouldn’t be different if I were going back to Duke, but for some reason, it feels different this time. I have a sinking feeling I can’t get out of my head.
Hunter’s popularity soared when he made waves as a starter his freshman year, but last season it was like a spotlight shone on him. Things only got crazier from there with the Heisman nomination last season as a sophomore, and I worry about the effects the pressure will have on him. Seeing how well JJ hid his struggles from everyone last year was really eye opening, but Hunter brushes it off every time someone brings up the blog posts speculating if he’s really the player of his generation.
Maybe I’d feel better if we were on more solid ground, but I can’t shake the uneasy feeling I have.
I’m already stressed about Javi’s surgery tomorrow, anddinner with everyone was a nice distraction, but I’ve grown really attached to him.
Hunter drags a hand through his damp hair, adjusting his glasses as he turns toward me. I try to muster a smile, but I’m sad. So many things are changing soon, and I don’t know if I’m ready for them.
“Are you okay?” Hunter asks, sitting down next to me.
“I’m fine. You going to be awake for dawn patrol with me?” I ask, trying to deflect from the question. Unfortunately, Hunter knows me too well. He rests a hand on my thigh, and the scrape of his calluses makes me shiver.
“Hey, talk to me please?”
“I’m going to miss you,” I admit, and Hunter has the nerve to smile. I force a frown, wishing he didn’t look so damn cute in his glasses. “Why are you smiling? I’m sad. You’re supposed to be making me feel better.”
“Because you’re gonna miss me,” he says, like it’s obvious. I didn’t think being sad about him leaving is something worth smiling over, but maybe that’s just me.
“Maybe I won’t miss you.”
It’s infuriating how his smile widens, and I move to stand up, but with a quick tug, Hunter pulls me into his lap. His arms fold around me like a warm blanket as he presses a chaste kiss to my temple. “You absolutely will miss me, just like I’m going to miss you,” he says, and I feel a little better.
“I still don’t understand why you’re smiling.”
“Do you think that after all this time I don’t know when something’s wrong? I know things have been kinda rocky between us lately, but we’re gonna be okay. I’ll come home when I can,” Hunter teases. After how poorly he handled it at first, now he’s the one handling this better than I am.
“At least you’ll only be two hours away,” I say, trying to believe him.
Hunter presses another kiss to the spot where his shirt hasslipped off my shoulder. “Kait, it’s going to be okay. I’ll only be a phone call away.”
“I know. I guess I’m getting worked up over nothing,” I say, giving him a smile. I reach up to slide his glasses back into place, and the corners of his eyes crinkle.
“I wouldn’t call it nothing,” he says, and I appreciate him making me feel better about the insecurities I’m having because of a choice I made. “You said the gallery was fun, right? Think of how much time you’ll have to work on your art. Maybe you could find a local painting class or something?”
Itwasfun. I’ve never fully appreciated or understood how much work went into making sure everything runs smoothly at the gallery. There’s a section dedicated to Thalia’s photography, but my mom and her make a point of featuring local artists in the space as well. Right now, there’s a wall of watercolors I can’t stop staring at.
“I think that’s a great idea. Thank you,” I say, feeling my heart soften.
“Of course. Besides, Mirabelle already told me she’s planning on spending a lot more time around here while Henry’s out of town for away games. You’ll be sick of her before you know it. And . . . you’ll have Bailey to keep you company.”
I’m surprised to hear him include Bailey, but I love him more for it.
“Do you promise you’re okay with me spending time with Bailey?” I saw how Hunter looked at him during the dinner, and it didn’t look like he was very okay with it then.
His touch on my cheek is gentle as he turns my face to his. “I promise I’m okay. I feel better after talking to you about what was going on with me,” Hunter says, and I’m glad, but I can’t shake the bad feeling I have.
Right now, as I stare into his eyes, all I can think about isthe intensity that lurked behind Bailey’s when he said,Ask me again why I left.
Why can’t I just let this go? Bailey is the last person I should be thinking about right now.
I swallow the lump in my throat, trying to will away all the questions lingering on the tip of my tongue.
“You know I love you, right?” he asks, and I do.
“Enough to wake up early with me to go surfing before Javi’s surgery?” I ask, and he huffs a quiet laugh.
