Wandering the house, I look for my parents, tired from being consumed by the guilt wreaking havoc on my system. It doesn’t matter how many times I’ve showered. It feels like I’ll never be rid of the smoke clinging to my skin. Hopefully, I can get some answers before they disown me.
The door to Mom’s office is cracked, and I hear a name I had still hoped was a lie.
“Bash, you don’t think the fire could’ve been Kiera, right?” she asks, her voice quiet, and I hold my breath, straining to hear.
“I don’t know why she would do anything now. It’s been years since our engagement ended, and I’ve never heard from her. Why would she want revenge now?” Dad asks, and my blood is pumping loudly in my ears. I don’t need to try holding my breath, because instead Ican’tbreathe.
It’s true?
I didn’t mishear Kiera’s name; the engagement was real, and they think she has grounds for revenge to even be considered for lighting the fire.
And then I’m walking through the door. Mom’s eyes are wide as she looks at me, startled by my entrance while Dad forces a smile.
“Hey, kiddo, what’s up?” Mom asks, and I don’t miss the way she glances at Dad.
They’re definitely hiding something.
They want to keep Kiera a secret.
They want to keep my brother a secret.
“I just had a quick question?” I try to keep my voice even, when all I want to do is scream.
“Okay?” Dad asks, coming up behind Mom to rest his hands on the back of her office chair.
What possible reason could I be asking this for? Why would I be questioning their love when I never have before?
“You guys have been together since college, right?”
Mom’s smile dims before she catches herself. “Yep. Right before my twenty-first birthday, and I never looked back.”
At least before now, I could try to defend them, but she just lied to me.
Dad doesn’t react, going along with it like it’s the truth.
“So why didn’t you guys get married until after Mirabelle and JJ were born if you’d been together that long?” I press, hoping they’ll just come clean.
Dad chuckles and shakes his head. “Because your mother isextremelystubborn. I also had to make sure she wasn’t only staying with me for my money,” he says, joking, but I don’t feel like laughing. It’s painfully obvious how much they love each other, but is their love worth it if it’s hurt other people along the way?
“Right. What makes you think I’m not playing the long game, and I’m out for your life insurance?” she teases, and I don’t trust myself to speak without bursting into tears.
I offer a tight smile when Mom winks at me. It’s the best I can do right now.
“Anything else?” Dad asks, and I hate how calm he is—like he didn’t abandon Carter twenty years ago.
I shake my head, opting to stay silent before walking out of the office. I walk down the hallway before changing my mind and going back. I want to scream and let them see how angry I am for all the deceit.
“Do you think he knows?” I barely hear Mom whisper.
“No. He can’t. B would have no reason to go looking thatfar back in the past,” Dad says, but he gets quieter, and I can’t hear what happens next.
The anger feels like a ruse to hold onto because if I don’t focus on how pissed off I am . . . I’ll be forced to realize how fucking sad it makes me to know everything was a lie.
“Dude, you quit soccer?” Hunter asks, barging into my room.
I slam my laptop shut, the screen filled with old articles. I’m trying to pin down a timeline using Mom’s old photographs to determine when my parents’ relationship could have ended before Dad met Kiera.
“Keep your voice down, and shut the door,” I say, pressing my hand to my chest to help slow the panicked beating of my heart. Well, that secret lasted about a day. “How the hell do you even know that?”
