It was Gar who spoke first.
“Thank you for saving me from that vicious beast,” he said. “I do not know why he does not like me, but clearly, I must have wronged him at some point in my life.”
Mattie shook her head. “He has his heart set on vengeance when it comes to you,” she said. “They say that dogs know people better than people do. Mayhap he knows that there has been unkindness between us and he is trying to protect me.”
Gar’s manner grew subdued. “Any unkindness has been my fault,” he said. “My lady, thank you for coming to speak with me. I must ask your forgiveness for any offense I caused. That has never been my intention.”
“Whatwasyour intention?”
She was giving him the chance to explain and Gar took it gratefully, even if it was to save his career, his future. He’d never been in a position like this in his life, but here he was, making the attempt to convince this woman that a marriage between them needed to go forward. Gar was great in negotiations with the Scots, dealing with men on their level, but this was different. Now, he was dealing with a woman and completely out of his depth. She’d accused him of being manipulative before.
Now, it was the truth.
He needed her.
“I am not entirely sure what my intention was, but it wasn’t hurting the feelings of a woman I do not know,” he said. “The truth is that I have known about his marriage for ten years, as have you. But my focus has been on my vocation. It has been my entire life. When I assumed command of Gleann na Fola, it was a great achievement for me. The Scots… There is a deep-seated hatred there and it is my duty to protect England, and my family, from that hatred. That is all I’ve thought about. When I told you that my home is a cold and brutal thing, that was the truth. No one has told you just how cold and isolated and brutal it is, have they?”
Mattie regarded him, her eyes glittering as she did so. “Nay,” she said. “No one has used those words.”
He lifted his eyebrows. “I think that your father, and my father, want this marriage to happen so badly that they refrain from telling you what it will really be like.”
Her gaze lingered on him a moment longer before she shrugged. “I would be willing to believe that,” she said. “My father has not told me anything. But you… It is clear you do not want this marriage. You told me about your castle, and where we will live, so that I would tell my father to break the betrothal. Be honest with me, Sir Gar. That is why you told me, isn’t it?”
He couldn’t lie to her. “Aye.”
“Then I did what you intended. I asked to break it.”
Gar nodded faintly, averting his gaze as if thinking on what she said, on the situation as a whole. His gaze then drifted downward until it came to rest on his breeches. He immediately pointed to them.
“Thank you for these,” he said. “I am wearing them, as you can see. It was a very generous gift.”
Mattie looked at the breeches. “If nothing else, they will hold together until you can find a better pair,” she said. “They may not fit you well, but they are well made.”
“They fit me perfectly,” he said, rubbing his left thigh to prove it. “You are very talented.”
“They are only breeches. They were not difficult.”
“Even so, you have my thanks.”
“You are welcome.”
The conversation lagged a little until Gar caught sight of a stone bench in the corner of his eye. “Shall we sit?” he said. “I… I think we have a few things to discuss.”
Mattie went over to the bench, sitting down as he sat down a foot or so away from her. The bench was on the edge of the fishpond and when the fish saw their shadows, they swam intheir direction, looking for food. Mattie pulled off the nearest flower and tossed it into the pond, watching the fish poke at it.
“Well?” she finally said. “What did you wish to discuss?”
That was a good question. Gar thought about it for a moment before replying. “My father and your father are very angry with me right now,” he said. “They did not want me to tell you the truth about Gleann na Fola, nor the living conditions. My father, in particular, is enraged at me and I do fear this incident will ruin my relationship with him.”
She looked at him seriously. “Why?”
Gar shrugged. “Because he knows I was not ready for this marriage,” he said. “He knows I tried to discourage you. My lady, if I hurt your feelings or damaged your pride, know that I am genuinely sorry. To be honest, I did not know how you felt about this marriage. I did not know you’d been looking forward to it. For all I knew, you were as reluctant as I, but I have since discovered that was not the case.”
Mattie sighed faintly, looking off to the fish in the pond again. “Every young woman looks forward to their wedding,” she said. “I am no different.”
“Mayhap there is part of me that is having difficulty understanding why anyone wouldwantto be married to me. I am not a prize.”
She looked at him again, brow furrowed. “Of course you are,” she said. “I told you that before. But if you do not want me, I cannot make you.”
