“It’s okay. You still looked really sexy doing it. I think you even gathered yourself some fans.” I gesture toward the people behind him who would probably have cursed anyone else into the next year for delaying their day, but instead are just swooning a little when he looks at them and tosses them a smile. You’d think that stunt would have been enough to dry up any desire someone might have.
We reach the platform, and he stares at the empty spot where the subway will be with trepidation.
“I hate these things.”
“Understandable. But I think you kicked it into submission last time, so it should go better this time.”
He debates that as the subway arrives and I drag him on. There are open seats this time, so I push him into one and he seems quite pleased at the opportunity to sit and not fall on his face—even if it would have brought me even more joy—and we ride the four stops to my apartment before getting out.
“This one was much better behaved. You mentioned lunch earlier. I am hungry.”
“It’s like ten in the morning.”
“Pizza, then?”
“Sure, we’ll have pizza for brunch,” I say.
He looks delighted.
Once back inside my apartment, I lead him into the bathroom. “You know how to work a shower?”
“I know how to have sex in one. I read it in your books. Shower sex. Tub sex. A lot of office sex.”
I sigh and show him how to turn it on and adjust the heat. I still have my gloves on, so I try to feel how hot it is by using my arm but manage to get my glove wet.
“You got your glove all wet,” he says as he reaches for me, but I jerk my trembling hand back.
Torin eyes me, and I realize that my reaction was pretty dramatic. Not as dramatic as him riding that escalator, but it was up there.
“If you need me, I’ll be right outside,” I state.
He nods and watches me go. I can tell because Kit continues to gaze at him instead of looking forward, which means that I have to blindly feel my way through the doorway. When I reach the main room, I sit down at a kitchen chair, not wanting to get the couch dirty, and peel my gloves off.
The black stain that had previously stained my fingertips has spread up to my palms and stretches up the back of my hands. It’s like I’ve dipped my fingers in black ink.
This is the same way my eyes went. At first, it was like I could see a black stain in my eye… and then my vision deteriorated more and more every day. It didn’t take me too long to realize that my magic was doing it, that I was literally blinding myself by simply using my own magic.
So will my hands be the next to go?
I swallow a lump in my throat. I made a fix for my eyes, but what will I do if I lose both hands? And then will it ever stop? Will it just kill me?—
“So what’s causing that?”
I jump when Torin speaks, and Kit looks over at him. Neither of us had heard the door open or him quietly moving.
“Nothing.”
“I can see that it’s something. What’s it matter if you tell me? You keep it a secret from your friends because you care whatthey think. You definitely don’t care what I think. Hell, maybe I can help you.”
“Help? I don’t think there’s any help for this.”
“You’re very smart, Riley, but you don’t know everything.”
And I decide he’s right. I sought help, but every step of the way left me discouraged. I asked healers and scientists… and when everyone I consulted knew nothing, I just gave up. Yet this strange man is telling me that I’ve given up too soon? I scoff. “Fine. All I know is that there’s something about using strong magic that is doing this to me. It started about four years ago.”
“It started with your eyes?” he asks as he comes around and sits in the chair across from me.
“Yes. Just a spot one day… and then it got worse and worse. Weak magic doesn’t affect me, so I did my best to provide help with the weakest magic I could use while working with my unit. Weak magic, like my witch magic that allows me to have Kit as a familiar, doesn’t affect me. It’s only strong magic that causes issues. I honestly don’t know how you could help. I went to a healer and sought help outside of the department, knowing that if the higher-ups found out, I would be removed from my position.
