He lifted a shoulder. “It is what it is. I’ve always hated that expression, but it fits in this case. I can’t change her condition.”
“Right.”
“I also can’t go back in time and pick a different dad, one who wasn’t a selfish ass and didn’t leave us penniless by walking out.”
As soon as he said the words, Bryce wished he could yank them back. He never talked about his dad or the scars that still ached from Mark Kendall’s abandonment of them.
He took a long sip of his water. “The only thing I can do is move forward. Try my best to get through it.”
“Sounds like that’s exactly what you’re doing,” she said. “Trying your best.”
“Most of the time it doesn’t feel like my best is very good,” he admitted.
“Don’t be so hard on yourself. Most of us feel like our best isn’t quite good enough. Will your mom be able to go back to the nursing home after she’s released from the hospital?”
“Yes. But she obviously won’t be as mobile as she was before, at least until the new hip heals. She will have to be watched more carefully. It puts a big burden on the staff, but they’re really caring there. I’m sure they’ll do a good job of keeping her safe.”
“How long has she been in the memory care center?”
“Two years. It probably should have happened at least a year before that, but I did my best to get by with home health and a caregiver I hired during the day while I was working.”
“And then you took care of her in the evening, after spending all day at jobsites?”
He didn’t like to remember the bleakness of that time. His mother had been slipping away for a long time, but those early years after her dementia diagnosis had been nothing short of hellish.
“It wasn’t that bad,” he lied. “She slept a lot, so I was able to have a bit of downtime after she was in bed.”
“Still, 24/7, with no vacation or sick leave allowed.”
“The world is filled with a silent army of caregivers, quietly doing whatever is necessary. I was only one of millions.”
“I think it’s wonderful,” she said. The admiration in her voice left him deeply uncomfortable and eager to change the subject.
“What about you?” he asked. “How are things going at home with your mom?”
“You probably know more about my rocky relationship with Rosie than I wish you did,” she muttered.
“I don’t know much at all,” he assured her. “Only that she is really glad to have you back in Wood Briar. She worried all the time about you when you were in Vegas. It was tough on her.”
Emma looked uncomfortable. “I was fine. Okay, maybe not the first few years after I left but eventually I was able to put my life back together. For the most part.”
“That couldn’t have been easy.”
“No. It wasn’t.”
Her simple words concealed what he knew must have been a Herculean effort.
“How did you get clean?” he asked, genuinely interested.
He thought at first she wasn’t going to answer him. After a long pause, she spoke in a low voice.
“When I found out I was pregnant with Emma, I quit everything cold turkey. I had no choice.”
“That must have been rough.”
She gave a tight laugh that told him far more than her words ever could. “You could say that. Would not recommend. One star out of ten.”
“Good to know.” He wanted to smile but her bleak expression stopped him.
