“Has it ever dawned on you that you probably haven’t ever been in a serious relationship because you’ve always been in love with your best friend?” Brody asked, tipping a shoulder up and pursing his lips. “You just weren’t ready for it before now.”
Bass nodded. “He’s right. You’re in a fucked situation.”
“Thank you. I’m more than aware. And there’s a lot at stake. But at the end of the day, I know she wants to go to New York. I know this is important to her. And if I tell her how I feel now, it’s going to confuse her and make her feel bad for choosing her own dreams over me. I’m not that fucking guy. I won’t do that.” I blew out a breath.
“So what are you going to do?” Brody asked.
“I’m going to suck it up and stick to the plan. I owe her that much. And we’ll see how it goes.” I cleared my throat. “But for now, I’m going to enjoy my time with her, all right?”
“Of course, brother. I get it. It’s a shit situation.” Bass shook his head. “But I do think you’re going to have to tell her how you feel at some point.”
“I’m going to let her take the lead on how we handle it when she leaves. Some things aren’t meant to be said. Sometimes loving someone means not being a selfish prick.” I tossed my napkin on the table and shrugged.
Brody chuckled. “Damn. You really are in love with the girl. It’s worse than I thought.”
“You’re a smart guy,” Bass added. “You need to trust your gut. And we’ll be here for you regardless.”
“Thanks. Don’t worry, it’ll all be fine.” I got up. “I need to stop wallowing and get my ass to work.”
I wanted to enjoy these last few weeks and not worry about what would happen after.
I’d pick up the pieces and figure it all out when I had to.
What other option did I have?
twenty-six
. . .
Gracie
“So you like the apartment?”Johnny asked from the other side of our Zoom call. “It’s in a great neighborhood. Fully furnished. Walking distance to the office.”
“I love it. It’s perfect,” I said.
He’d sent me over a listing for an apartment that the company had sublet for me for the first three months after I arrived. It belonged to a client he’d done work for in Los Angeles, and she had several homes, and apparently she never used her Manhattan apartment. So she’d offered to rent it to J&J for three months, and she’d consider extending the lease at that time.
Seeing as I didn’t even know where I wanted to live there, I was thrilled that he’d come up with a reasonable solution. I had three months to figure out where I’d rent permanently after that.
And this was the best area possible, according to Johnny.
He’d grown up in New York, and then moved to Los Angeles to open J&J Interiors with his cousin Jenna before moving back to the Big Apple to focus on that office.
“Are you ready for this move? The countdown is on. Three weeks to go. Everything is falling into place.” He smiled and leaned back in his chair. “I posted all those photos that you sentme of the Chadwick home on the website, so clients could see your recent work. That project was truly spectacular, darling.”
Johnny was the most exuberant, enthusiastic person on the planet. He always dressed to the nines in his designer suits, and his personality was larger than life. He’d been the most amazing mentor to me when I’d started at the firm, and we’d formed a close friendship.
“Yes. It was a great project to dip my toes back into design. The budget was the largest I’ve worked with, and they really gave me creative control for all the interior furnishings, which was wonderful.”
“Well, we’ve gotten so many messages about the design. You really nailed it. It was very unique. Very you,” he said. “And that’s what you bring to the table. This very special design aesthetic, along with the ability to know what your clients want, and then to be able to give it to them. It’s a gift. And I’m so thrilled to have you back at the firm, and we’re going to be in New York City together. It doesn’t get any better.”
“It really doesn’t,” I said, but it felt forced. “But I’m sure I’ll be doing a lot more modern, contemporary designs when I get to New York.”
“Yes. It’s a different vibe here for sure. I had to pivot a bit from what I was used to out west. The sort of organic, boho vibe was popular there, and it’s darker and moodier here for the most part. You’ll get your occasional client who wants a European vibe, or a very traditional aesthetic—but modern minimalist is a popular trend on the East Coast right now.” He chuckled. “I believe in you. You’re a very talented woman.”
“Thank you, Johnny. I’m so honored that you trust me to work for you.” I sighed. I was thrilled about this next adventure, but it was a weird mix of emotions for me. I didn’t realize that I could be excited about something while dreading it at the same time.
How could I feel such strong feelings that completely conflicted with one another?
