He grabs my shoulder before I can reach the door and slams me back against the far wall. “Nope, you’re not running away from me or this conversation.”
I bare my teeth at him in a silent snarl like a cornered animal, but it doesn’t faze him.
He just crosses his arms over his chest and stares at me, unimpressed. “It’s time to talk like adults, Alex.”
“I told you I didn’t want to talk about this.”
“Too fucking bad.We’re talking about it. About how you’re pushing everyone away and acting like more of a surly bastard than Rhys because I kissed and finger-fucked Ollie.”
Even though I already know what happened between them, hearing it from him—my best friend since we were ten—is like a kick to the gut. The air leaves my lungs in a pained wheeze and is quickly replaced with burning rage and betrayal.
Some of it must show on my face because Theo’s hard stare softens. “I know it’s tough to hear, but I’m telling you what I told her; she’s free to do as she pleases with her body, withwhoevershe wants.”
Sure, I understand that. But that’s not what has thisinfernoboiling in my chest.
“This isn’t about what she did with you. It’s about whatyoudid.”
His brow furrows. “What do you mean?”
Of course he doesn’t get it. I scoff and shake my head. “I’ve made my stance clear several times;I don’t want to share Ollie. But no matter how many times I tell you, you just completely ignore me. Sure, Ollie can do what she wants with herself. I know she doesn’t belong to anyone. But did you even stop and think for asecondabout whether kissing and touching her would hurt someone other than yourself?”
He blinks and his mouth opens and closes a few times as if he’s lost for words. The surprise on his face is enough of an answer for me.
“Yeah, didn’t think so,” I say with a bitter laugh. “Just like before, you just jumped in with both feet without even thinking how it’ll impact other people.”
His jaw clenches and he steps towards me, his eyes flashing with anger. “That’s not fucking fair, Alex,” he growls as he glares up at me. “What happened with Willow happened to all of us—weallagreed to the relationship, and we were all hurt by what she did. You act like you’re the only one carrying pain and heartache from that relationship, like you’re the only oneterrifiedof getting hurt. Well, newsflash, asshole!You aren’t.”
I shove off the wall and close the distance between us, my rage a writhing, living thing inside me. “Don’t youdaretry to tell me that we both experienced the same thing, because we didn’t. What Willow did almostdestroyedme.” Painful memories flit through my mind, causing old wounds to tear into my heart.
Theo rolls his eyes. “Oh, fuck off, Alex. She cheated on all of us, regardless of whether or not she wanted me. The result is the same; we all walked away with broken hearts that day. But it also happenedten years ago. Get over it. Move on! I fucking did, and you can too. Just let it go.”
He still doesn’t get it. He’s still notlisteningto me.
He makes it seem like I’m just holding onto this heartachefor funand not because I had my heart ripped from my chest and crushed. Like all I need to go is just pretend I’m a bloody Disney princess, sing a song andmove on.
The realisation that my best friend isdismissingmy concerns cuts deep, slicing my already bleeding heart into ribbons. But those wounds also unleash the fury that’s been blazing inside me. It spills out with the pain and fear I’ve been holding onto ever since we discovered that we all wanted Ollie, turning into a thick, caustic sludge thatburns.
My fist flies before I can even blink and smashes into the side of Theo’s face. Pain bursts across my knuckles from connecting with his sharp as fuck cheekbone. Theo grunts and staggers back, a dark bruise already forming beneath his eye.
My other fist flies at him, a wild punch that he easily dodges as his training as an MMA fighter and instructor kicks in. Several more punches follow, but he avoids or blocks them all. But no matter how many times I try to hit him, my rage isn’t sated.
“Alex, what the fuck? Stop!”
“I told you not to push me, Theo. I told you I wasn’t ready, that I didn’t want to share again. But youdidn’t fucking listen. You never bloody do! She didn’t just cheat and then leave me, she fuckingwreckedme!” The words burst out of me as I throw more punches at him.
He shakes his head. “She hurt all of us—”
I don’t let him finish, my hurt and fear andrageripping the words from my lips. “Do you want to know what she told me when she left? What makes me so fuckingterrifiedto even think about sharing Ollie?”
It’s then that I realise that this isn’t just about Ollie, but frustration that my supposed best friend put his own wants and needs above my own, regardless of how much it’d hurt me. That something in my life that ripped my heart to shreds is just something I shouldget over.
It must show on my face because horror streaks across Theo’s face. “Alex…”
“She told me the only reason she even agreed to be with all three of us was so she could haveyou. That no one could ever want someone as fucked up, damaged, and dangerous as me. The only good thing aboutme was my bloody cock and even then she said both you and Rhys were better fucks than me.”
Bile burns my throat as I remember the cruel, pitying smile on her lips as she told me all of this. The sick glee gleaming in her eyes as she ripped my heart to pieces and stomped on it for good measure.
“She never wanted me, Theo. She only ever wanted you and tolerated Rhys because she enjoyed being dominated every now and again. I was always the fourth wheel, the pathetic puppy that doesn’t understand when it’s not wanted. Because you know what happened after she tore into me like that?”
