Before he could reach for his clothes, Jeff moved up behind him, took hold of his wrists, and held him in place.
He noticed the subtle tremble under Mack’s skin. Anger over Jeff showing up unannounced? Frustration with Daniel? Or was it merely everything coming to a head, the emotion desperate to get out of the bottle Mack had locked it in?
Because he couldn’t resist, Jeff pressed his lips to Mack’s shoulder, inhaled the spicy scent he’d always loved. “I’m serious about dinner.”
“I can’t go to dinner with you,” Mack said, his tone losing its edge.
“But you canhavedinner with me. I told you, I already picked it up.” He kissed Mack’s other shoulder, trying to keep the move casual, though it wasn’t easy when Mack was standing so beautifully naked before him.
Mack didn’t move.
“You get dressed. I’ll set up the food. Join me when you’re ready.”
“Why don’t you just fuck me now. Get it over with so you can leave.”
Jeff frowned, releasing his grip on Mack’s wrists. “I’m not here to fuck you.”
Mack’s head fell forward. “That’s all I’m good for, Jeff. If I was a stronger man, I’d push you away, make you leave. But I’m not.”
Flattening his palms on Mack’s smooth, muscled back, he ran his fingers over warm skin.
“This is wrong,” Mack whispered. “You know it as well as I do. And it’s temporary. Don’t tell me you’ve suddenly accepted a happily never after.”
Jeff didn’t think of this as temporary, but he wasn’t going to argue. Mack had already made up his mind. The proof was staked in the front yard, the For Sale sign a shining beacon of Mack’s defeat.
“Have dinner with me,” Jeff said softly, then stepped away, leaving Mack in his bedroom to get dressed.
By the time he had the food set up on the table, two glasses of wine added, Mack appeared wearing the charcoal-gray T-shirt Jeff loved. It was old and worn, thinning in some spots. Jeff liked it because it reminded him of the man. That and it brought out the gray in Mack’s beard, the blue of his eyes.
“Are you on call?” Mack asked as he pulled out a chair, the legs scraping over the tattered and peeling linoleum.
“Not tonight.”
Jeff sat, picked up his fork, and realized Mack wasn’t making a move to eat.
“It’s your favorite,” he said, as though Mack couldn’t see the chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes, and green beans Jeff had picked up at the diner in town.
When Mack’s gaze lifted, his eyes were stormy with emotion, and it nearly knocked Jeff out of his chair.
“I can’t do this,” Mack whispered. “I can’t.”
Jeff didn’t ask what he was referring to. It could’ve been a number of things, but he got the feeling it was a general statement. Partially directed at him for attempting to turn this into something more, partially in reference to what his own son was putting him through.
Didn’t matter the reason, because Jeff could hear the truth in those words. The man he’d loved for as long as he could remember was hurting, and it pained him to see it.
Rather than force the issue or try to dig into Mack’s psyche, Jeff put his fork down and stood. He walked around the table, took Mack’s hand, and tugged him to his feet. A few minutes later, they were lying in Mack’s bed, fully dressed. Jeff spooned behind him, arm draped over Mack’s ribs.
He pressed a kiss to the back of Mack’s neck and kept quiet. Sleep was what Mack really needed. Perhaps once he’d gotten a few hours of shut-eye, they’d be able to hash this out.
If not, well, there was always tomorrow.
Chapter Five
Mack woke in his darkened bedroom, awarm body behind him. He knew who it was from touch alone, but even if Jeff hadn’t been wrapped around him, Mack would’ve known anyway. He’d always been able to sense Jeff, and right now, he knew he was awake, which was the reason Mack didn’t move, just let Jeff’s warmth seep into him. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d slept so peacefully. Probably not since he’d shared a bed with Jeff years ago.
God, he’d missed this. Being held, loved, protected. He’d spent years feeling as though he was floundering on his own, no roots, nothing to look forward to. And it was all because he’d lost this. The man he loved. In an effort to make up for his sins, Mack had forsaken his own happiness, though these days he couldn’t help wondering why he’d been so stupid. No matter how hard he tried, he clearly couldn’t make up for failing Daniel, and the more he tried, the more pieces of himself he lost.
“You awake?” Jeff’s voice drifted from behind him, the sexy sound rough from sleep.
