“I am forbidden from thanking you, so I am being creative. Obviously.”
My lips twitched. “Obviously.”
She grinned, then yawned. “Wow, I’m exhausted.”
“I bet. If you need anything, tell me. I mean that, okay?”
She nodded, swallowing as she shifted on her feet. “I want to say thank you like a thousand times, but I can’t, and I don’t know how to say good night.”
I chuckled, closing the distance between us and wrapping her in my arms. She smelled good, really good, and she was warm and fit me perfectly. I rested my chin on top of her head, sighing in relief. She was safe. She was here. She leaned her head against my chest, and I ran my hands up and down her arms, acting like it was for her, but it was for me. “This’ll do then. A good night hug,” I said, not quite ready to let her go.
“You know I like my hugs,” she mumbled, letting go of me and heading toward her room. “See you in the morning, Noah. Night.”
She shut the door softly without looking back, and I stood there like a fool, drowning in regret. I’d be exhausted tomorrow if I didn’t try to sleep, but sleep never came easily. Nights were the worst where all the thoughts came back, and after tossing and turning for an hour, sleep finally came.
I woke to nails on the floor and a small hand on my arm. “Uncle Noah,” Miles whispered. “There is a dog on my bed!”
His voice sounded excited. I scrubbed my face with my hand and pushed up. My body felt like a train had hit me, but I powered through. “That is Sassy,” I said. “She is a guest. Be nice.”
“A guest?”
“A friend is staying with us for a bit. She needed some help, but Sassy is hers.”
“Come see her. Come, Uncle Noah, come!” He held out his hand, and whenever he did that, I couldn’t help but take it. The kid had dragged me to see dead bugs, a straw twisted weird, and now Sassy.
I let him drag me toward his bedroom, where Sassy was sprawled out on his little bed. The dog truly was the length of the bed, from back paw to front paws, all stretched out. “Wow, look at her.”
“She likes me, huh? She’s in my room!” Miles whispered, his sleep face clashing with his wide, happy eyes.
“Sassy must like you, buddy.”
At the mention of her name, Sassy stirred and jumped up in one motion. She shook out her ears and pranced right to Miles, licking him on the face. The kid giggled and giggled and wrapped his arms around her. “I love her!”
“Sassy! Damn it!” Em jogged down the hall, stopping when she saw Miles, Sassy, and me. Some color had returned to her face. Her braided hair was so cute and messy, with little blonde curls escaping near her forehead. My sweatshirt hung low on her frame. I knew she wore shorts, but the oversized fabric swallowed them, giving the illusion she didn’t. Her long bare legs were smooth. Damn.
I never had the opportunity to see Em in the morning like this, and I loved it. A lot.
“Did she wake you up, Miles?” Em snapped her fingers, calling for Sass, but the dog remained with Miles. “Oh wow, she must really like you, Miles!”
Miles giggled and scratched behind Sassy’s ears, causing the dog’s tail to thump even more. “She was in bed with me!”
“Oh, that’s really special. That means she really, really likes you!”
“This is so cool, Uncle Noah! We have a dog now!”
“Ah, well, it’s Em’s dog. This is my friend I told you about. She’s staying with us for a while, but Sassy is hers.”
“Well, then can we get a dog?”
Fuck. I gripped the back of my neck, panic setting in. These were the moments I didn’t know how to navigate. I would disappoint him with my answer, which I was trying not to do. But I had to be real with him. I didn’t want to lie. And if my sister hadn’t left him to me and to my parents, he’d have a dog already.Why did you pick me, Nat?
Why not make the easy choice and let him live with our parents?
I thought about her note, saying I was the only one who could watch over Miles. She meant what she said, since she was always direct like that. No bullshit. But fuck, I hated how this had made my parents change.
Em smiled and neared Miles, crouching to pet Sassy and be on Miles’s eye level. “Ah, so here’s the deal. Dogs are a lot of work. So much work. To have one, you have to show your uncle you are super responsible. I think you can practice with Sassy while I’m here. Does that sound good?”
“I can do that! Yes! I’m respons…what word did you say?”
