“What? Why?” I can hear the hurt and shock in his voice and it tears at my heart. “Ollie, sweetheart, talk to me.” He places his hand on my shoulder, but I shrug him off.
I can’t deal with him touching me while I’m causing him pain. I need to stay strong. Their friendship is worth more than anything they would have had with me.
“I told you before that this is just going to end in heartbreak and I refuse to get between you and your friends. I’m not likeher.”
“Not like… Theo told you about Willow?” There’s a strange tone to his voice and I risk a glance at him. His face has shuttered, his blue eyes dull and his face a blank mask. It’s a complete departure from Alex’s usually bright and caring self that it’s unnerving and sets my teeth on edge.
I nod and look away. “He did, before we got attacked.” Should I not have told him I knew? Am I making shit even worse? My stomach cramps with nausea. “It’s fine. I understand. I’ve had cheating exesin the past—”understatement of the year“—so I know what it’s like to have your heart ripped out. We can still be friends, though.”
I try to smile at him, but it feels more like a grimace, so I look away. And then, like the coward I am, I surge forward and move away from him, using Bean as a shield between us so I don’t have to see the hurt on his face. Or worse, that cold, emotionless mask.
My stomach roils with nerves and my heart feels like it’s a gaping wound, but it’s fine. It’s worth it. Their friendship is worth more. This is for the best, because any relationship between us was doomed to fail from the start. I’m convinced that it would have been a disaster. A painful one.
But if that’s the case, then why am I struggling to believe it?
Stubborn Bastards
Theo
Nothing is going righttoday.
First, we get attacked at the house we were staying in for the night and Rhys ends up severely injured. Then Ollie has this terrifying freak out while on the road that leads to Alex kissing the fuck out of her. But instead of it cementing their relationship like it should have, it’s only driven Ollie further away. And not just from Alex, but from me, too.
She’s walking apart from us both, keeping her horse between us so neither of us can even try to catch her eye while we walk. Alex is in a foul mood, constantly shooting daggers at the back of my head that I’m sure would have murdered me a million times if looks could kill. I told Ollie I’d convince the other two that a relationship between all four of us would work, but the longer Alex glares at me, the more I’m questioning that.
And it pisses me the fuck off.
The sun is high in the sky by the time we find a small stream to take a quick water break at. So far, we’ve only come across a few zombies that were easily taken care of and there’s been no sign of the Scourge. I have no idea how the hell they found us at that damn cottage, but it seems they’ve lost our trail. Which is a relief because we’re in no shape for another firefight, especially with Rhys still unconscious on Bean.
After checking his wounds, I sit down by the stream, watching the water trickle by as I absently sip from my canteen. There’s a thick, uncomfortable silence weighing heavily on us that not even the chirping of birds and the rustling of trees can slice through. Alex is sitting on my left, and the bastard isstillglaring at me. The anger that’s been simmering in my chest burns hotter the longer he stares until I can no longer take it.
“Take a damn picture, it’ll last longer,” I snarl as I stare at him with a glare of my own.
His hands flex as they rest on his thighs and his face reddens. “Why the bloody hell would I want a picture of your ugly mug?”
“Fuck if I know, but you seem hellbent on glaring at me, so what is your fucking problem?” I knowexactlywhat his problem is; she’s sitting several metres apart from us, with both Harlow and Bean between us and out of earshot.
“You know what my problem is.” His hands ball into fists as they tremble, and I can tell he’s struggling against the need to rearrange my face. “I can’t believe you fucking told her about Willow, aftereverythingthat woman did to me, to us.”
I wince at the raw hurt in his voice. “Alex,” I say with a sigh, my anger draining away. “It’s been nearly ten years since she left. You need to let it go.”
His eyes harden. “Easy for you to say. You’re not the one she dropped like yesterday’s rubbish and laughed in your face.”
“She still cheated on me,” I shoot back.
“She cheated on all of us, not just you! But at least she fuckingwantedyou.”
Shit. This isn’t getting us anywhere. I blow out a frustrated breath and rake a hand through my hair. “Ollie isn’t Willow,” I say, changing tactics, hoping to get through his thick skull.
We like to laugh that Rhys is the stubborn one of our group, but Alex can be just as bad, especially when it’s about something that scares him. Because this is what all this is about; he’s terrified of being hurt again and I don’t blame him. Honestly, he and Ollie have a lot in common with their stubborn need to protect their hearts.
“You think I don’t know that?” he snaps back with a frustrated growl. “But just because she’s not like Willow doesn’t mean that I want to do that again. Ican’tdo that again, Theo. I refuse to share Ollie like that.”
God, I really want to wring his stupid, stubborn neck right now and knock some sense into him. Forcing her to choose will only drive her away. Can’t he see that this is just going to end in disaster? That his fear is stopping all of us from being happy?
“Can you two keep your pointless argument down? My shoulder and arm are already sore as fuck; I don’t need to add a headache to the mix,” Rhys grumbles from Bean’s saddle. He’s still lying on her neck, his head facing us with his eyes half-open. His face is contorted into a grimace and his jaw is tight from pain, but he no longer looks like he’s on death’s door.
I scowl at him as his words sink in. “Pointless?”
