“Nay, I have not.” He waved Angus into the room and poured him a glass of whisky.
“But you did the right thing, Duncan. Do not think otherwise, not even for a minute. Bennett got what he deserved, and Scotland thanks you for it. You shouldn’t be punishing yourself. You deserve a medal.” He accepted the glass Duncan held out.
“I have no regrets, Angus.” Duncan sat down on the sofa.
Angus’s eyes narrowed, and he stared at Duncan skeptical y. “I’ll argue that point, because I believe you have one very big regret—the loss of the colonel’s daughter.” Heswallowed the whisky in a single gulp and set the glass down on the corner of the desk next to atallstack of books.
Duncan crossed one leg over the other and looked toward the window. His silence seemed to stir Angus’s impatience.
He began to pace the room.
“You’re better off without her, Duncan. Surely you know that. She left you, for God’s sake. What kind of woman…?”
He stopped and took a breath. “We’ve been through a lot together, you and me. And despite our differences lately, I consider you my friend. I respect your leadership and your strength and yourskillson the battlefield. You’ve saved my life more than once, as I’ve saved yours.” He paused. “Come back to us, Duncan. Forget about the Englishwoman. She was not worthy of you. She was in love with that worm, Bennett, and defended him until the end. You can do better.
Al you need is a pretty little Scottish lass to turn your head and remind you that you’re a proud and strapping Highland warrior.” He paused again and took a breath. “Make no mistake, I loved my sister, and I’ll always be indebted to you for what you did to herkiller, but it’s time for us both to move on. Pick up your weapons again, Duncan. Don your tartan and carry your shield with pride.”
Duncan frowned at him. “Pick up my weapons? For what purpose?”
“What other purpose is there but to fight? The rebel ion has withdrawn, most of the Highlanders have retreated to their farms, yet the English arestillhere. We need to drive them out of our country once and forall, while westillhave their fear in our hands. Bennett’s head in a bag is already spreading a wave of terror through the English garrisons. I say we continue our rampage until they retreat completely, back across the border.”
Duncan considered this. He gazed out the window at the clouds in the sky andrecalledthe Butcher’s rampage of terror in the past. It had been effective, there was no question of that, and with Bennett’s death the Butcher’s infamy would only grow.
Yet there were other things to consider. There was thesmallmatter of his conscience, and his dreams, night after night.…
He met Angus’s gaze. “I believe I can exert more influence through the Moncrieffe title. I have the ear of the King, and despite what has come to pass between Amelia and me, I am certain that her uncle, the duke,willcontinue to support my efforts to establish peace, if I choose to step forward and make a case for it.”
Angus scoffed. “Winslowewillnot hear a single word you say after what you did to his niece. I’d be surprised if she hasn’t already told him who you are and how you abducted her in the dead of night, and threatened her life. An army of redcoats could come marching in here any day now. Which is why I suggest you don your tartan and ride out of here while youstillcan. Iain can take your place here. He’s more suited to this kind of life than you are.”
“Ameliawilltellno one,” Duncan said. “She gave me her word.”
Angus scoffed bitterly. “You trust her word, do you? The word of the English?”
“Aye, I trust it.”
“Be sensible, Duncan. Use your head.”
A wave of anger washed over him, and he stood. “How do you expect me to be sensible? The woman I wanted as a wife is repulsed by me. She thinks I’m more of a monster than that raping, pillaging pig Richard Bennett. ForallI know, she could be carrying my child, and Iwillnever know.”
Duncan could hear the sound of his heart thudding in his ears. Perhaps Angus could hear it, too, because he took a sudden step back.
“And I do not even have my weapons,” Duncan continued.
“They’re at the bottom of Loch Shiel.”
“Fook, Duncan. What are they doing there?”
He pinched the bridge of his nose. “I cannot say. I barely remember.allI know is that they were weighing me down and I probably would’ve drowned if I hadn’t let them drop.”
“But your father’s sword—he passed it down to you.”
“It’s a hundred years old,” Duncan told him. “You think I don’t know that?” He strode to the window and slammed his fist down on the stone ledge. “I think I’ve lost my mind.”
For a long time he stood there, looking out at the lake; then he felt Angus’s hand on his shoulder.
“Fight, Duncan. It’s what you were born for. It’ll restore your sanity. Trust me in that, and come with me today.”
Duncan shook his friend’s hand away. “Nay! Itwillonly make me more of a madman. I cannot do it. Something else has to be done.”
