“Hear, hear,” Joker mocks, raising his coffee mug, a move Gregg mimics seeing as he was just a target of Pecan’s poor eating habits.
“What Mom doesn’t know won’t hurt her.”
“Funny how this works both ways,” I tell him in a singsong voice. “You’re not the only one due a call from Aunt Helmie.”
He carefully places his fork on his plate. “Excuse me?”
“Aunt Helmie,” I purr. “She’s due to call me for our monthly chat.”
His eyes narrow. “You wouldn’t.”
“I would. Not only because I want you to give me and Zach some privacy, but you’re gross?—”
He presses a hand to his chest. “You wound me.”
“Having a front-row seat to your breakfast mid-mastication is woundingme.”
Zach snorts. “Considering Aunt Helmie’s such a stickler for this shit, this is probably his idea of a rebellion.”
Pecan sticks a finger at him. “My man, that’sit. I knew it was a wise move for you to take psychology.”
“You’d be the only one who’d think that. Professor Bering hates me.”
“She hates everyone,” Joker inserts. “Something to do with a forensic psychology student she once had. He turned her off ALL people.”
“That’s an urban legend,” Mason chortles.
“It’s true! They say he kidnapped her and that visiting professor, the English Lit?—”
“Maclean,” Alec tacks on.
“—saved her.”
“Maclean’s too much of an asshole to save anyone.” I shake my head at the routine bullshit these fuckers spread. “He’d curdle milk with that smile which, actually, should be a crime because he’s beautiful.”
Zach gags. “No way.”
“Yes way.” I call out, “Lex! Professor Maclean, hot as actual fuck, right?”
She whistles. “Hotter than actual fuck.”
“Wynter?” I prompt.
Cackling, she blows on her fingers like they’re burning. “Even hotter than that. Shame his personality makes mass murderers look friendly.”
“Who’s that?” Victoria inquires.
Lex places two Dopie breakfast specials on Wynter’s table for her friends. “He’s a guest professor. Lives in France.”
“You know him, Vick,” Shay prods. “I’m not gay and I think he’s hot.”
“He can’t bethatcute.”
“That’s because you haven’t seen him with Mrs. Maclean. She’s, like, the center of his world,” Lexcoos.
As Lexi and the trio begin rating the cuteness of the staff, crowing, I turn to Zach. “See! What did I just say?”
“All right, all right,” Zach complains. “I haven’t even met the fucker and I never want to.”
