“Matthew, I’m going to go. Don’t call again tonight.”
I rip the phone away from my ear and press the red button. My brain is a mess and I suddenly feel like I might cry, but I’m also proud of myself. Because somehow I shut it down when I wanted so badly to hear what he had to say. But I have to hear it sober and not when I’ve got someone else in my room.
Jamie.
“I’m so sorry J—” I begin, spinning round, but there’s no one there.
He’s gone.
Hi Matthew, hope you had a good weekend
and the hangover isn’t too bad! I haven’t
heard from you, you said you’d message to
work out a time when we can meet?
Maybe an evening this week?
X
Hey, just tried calling again to try to
schedule in this chat. As you said
when you called, it would be good to
see each other and talk everything through
x
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
I feel mortified.
How did I think it was in any way appropriate to pick up a phone call from my ex-fiancé while I was with another guy?! That must have made Jamie feel terrible. I wanted so badly to track him down and explain it to him, but I realized that I didn’t understand what had happened myself, so what would I say?! Besides, the moment was over. I’d completely ruined it.
You know what the most annoying thing is? I hadn’t even been thinking about Matthew. I wasn’t thinking about the breakup or my sorry little story. I was having fun. I was happy.
And then Matthew swoops in with his drunken phone call and what happens?!
Just like that, I turn into a mess.
“You’re not a mess,” Ruby asserts, handing me a mug of hot chocolate with marshmallows on the top, as I curl up on her sofa, feeling very sorry for myself. “It’s not your fault.”
“It’s completely my fault,” I tell her. “I didn’t have to pick up. I shouldn’t have answered that phone. I didn’t need to listen to a word Matthew had to say.”
“He called you four times,” Leo says, looking at me sympathetically. “I think anyone would have done the same. You’d be too curious not to answer.”
“I feel so embarrassed, and Jamie must think I’m such a loser!”
Ruby can’t help but smile. “Freya, he won’t think you’re a loser.”
“Yes, he will. He’ll think that I can’t resist my ex-boyfriend even when I’m literally in the arms of another guy. Ugh.” I slap my forehead with my hand. “I hate myself.”
“Stop it,” Ruby says sternly. “Leo’s right. You were in an impossible situation. It’s a complete headfuck. Anybody would understand you picking up when he was calling you so many times. Jamie would understand.”
I wince. “He did say that.”
