I wiped the tears that had collected under my eyes and sniffed. “Sorry. Let’s eat, Nugget.”
She trotted off to the table and I grabbed some plates from the cabinet.
We sat down and ate in silence. Well, I ate and I watched as Lexi pushed her noodles around on her plate. I’d ordered in from the Italian eatery on the corner, but it wasn’t as good as Sadie’s spaghetti.
It was bland, and flavorless compared to the zesty, delicious flavor of Sadie’s sauce. It was sort of like life, everything seemed bland and flavorless without Sadie in it.
“I miss Sadie and Eeyore and Achoo.” Her bottom lip quivered.
So do I.
“I know. Hey, did you want to go to the shelter tomorrow morning and see if we can’t find our own puppy or kitty?” She’d been asking for a pet for years now. I hadn’t planned on giving in quite yet, I’d wanted to wait until she was old enough to care for it on her own, but desperate times and all that.
She looked as if she was considering the offer, but then her eyes filled with tears. My plan had backfired big time.
“No. I just want Achoo and Eeyore.”
She pushed her plate away from her and laid her head down on the table.
I wasn’t sure how to handle this. I hated seeing her in pain. This was what I’d wanted to avoid. I wanted to protect her from hurting.
“Do you want to go to Disneyland?”
Lexi’s eyes widened. “Really?”
I knew this was setting a bad precedent, but I wanted to get the hell out of the city and see a smile on my Nugget’s face.
I stood and she reached up for me. When I scooped her into my arms, she was cheering. But as we went back into her room to pack, she asked, “Can Sadie come with us?”
“No, she can’t. Do you still want to go?”
She thought about it for a second and then nodded. “Okay, go get your toothbrush, pajamas, and some shorts.”
As she ran down the hall to her room, I pulled out my phone and texted Mia.
Me:Going to Disneyland for a couple of days. Clear my schedule.
Mia:Disneyland?
Me:Yes. Do you want to go?
Mia:Does a bear shit in the woods?
Me:One rule. No Sadie talk.
Bubbles appeared and then disappeared indicating that she had typed something but then deleted it. Then a message popped up.
Mia:Booking the flights and hotel now.
Before I put my phone away, I pulled up a picture Sadie had sent me of her and Lexi making meatloaf the second week she was here. They were both wearing aprons and laughing. Then I scrolled through other pics she’d sent me, her and Lexi at the park, her and Lexi doing their nails, her and Lexi dressing up as princesses.
Why was I torturing myself like this? I needed to delete all of these pics off my phone.
“Ready!” Lexi appeared in the hallway; her bag was overflowing with stuffed animals.
“Did you remember your toothbrush, or pajamas, or shorts and a T-shirt?”
She looked down at her bag.
I smiled down at her and I saw her mother in her eyes. She looked so much like Ash, just like AJ had been the spitting image of me. Everything was wrong without them being here. And I didn’t see how it could ever be right again.
My phone rang and I looked down expecting it to be Mia, but it was Sadie’s name. She’d called earlier today and left a message. She’d left two messages yesterday. I knew why she was calling. The woman from the property management company had mentioned to Mia that Sadie was concerned about the renovations.
I hadn’t spared any expense when it came to her home, the bakery, or the security there. I could hear in her voice that she wasn’t happy about the changes, probably because she viewed it as a handout or charity.
But the truth was, they weren’t either of those things. She deserved the best. Which was exactly why I needed to stay away from her. Which would be a lot easier if I was hundreds of miles away in the happiest place on earth.
