He couldn’t be sure, he realized — and for that reason, he absolutely needed to review this letter before he allowed Chelsea to get anywhere near it. Chelsea didn’t need to hear that Silas had wanted her to marry Miles. That was more pressure than anyone ought to have to deal with.
He tucked Bear under his arm. At least this was a straightforward, good thing. His father had found Bear for Miles’s baby, and Miles would pass it on. As for whatever was in the letter… he would have to wait and see.
CHAPTER 20
CHELSEA
“He threw you out?” Heather sounded outraged. She set her glass of wine down hard on Chelsea’s kitchen island, the liquid sloshing up the side of the glass. “You could probably sue him for that, Chelsea.”
“No, he didn’t throw me out,” Chelsea said. “And I don’t want to sue him, anyway. He didn’t do anything wrong.I’mthe one who made the decision to leave.”
“Well, he must have done something tomakeyou leave,” Heather insisted. “After all that time you spent together… I know you weren’t sure how he felt about you, but he was the one who asked you to move in with him in the first place. And now?—”
“And now nothing. He would have let me go on living there if I had wanted to,” Chelsea said. “He didn’t even know I was leaving, Heather. I slipped out while he was at work and told Trudy where I was going so he wouldn’t be left in the dark, but I didn’t give him the chance to argue or try to convince me to stay.”
“You think he would have?”
“I think so.” Chelsea had spent some time considering that question in the forty-eight hours since she had left Miles’s house. “Things like keeping promises are very important to Miles, and he always told me I’d be taken care of. I have to be grateful for that — he’s serious about the responsibility he has as this baby’s father. A less honorable man might have tried to stick me with everything.”
“Didn’t the two of you sign a contract?” Heather asked. “He probably just feels like he can’t get out of his contract.”
“No, I really don’t think that’s it. It was his idea to sign papers in the first place… and, if I’m honest, I think he did that out of concern for my comfort.” Chelsea sighed. “He’s a good man, Heather. I know it would be easier to hate him right now. A part of me wishes I could. But he’s still my child’s father, and he’s still providing for us.”
Heather bit her lip. “What happened exactly? You never said. You told me you had realized you had to leave, but you didn’t say why. And I know his father just died… You wouldn’t have left right after something like that if it wasn’t really serious. I know you didn’t leave over something petty while he was grieving.”
“Of course not,” Chelsea said. She frowned, trying to find the words to explain. “I believe that he would have let me stay, like I said. But I don’t believe he really wanted us there. Not anymore. After he found out his father had died, the very first thing he said was that our arrangement had been for nothing.”
Heather’s face turned pale. “He actually said that? That it was all for nothing?”
“I’m not angry with him,” Chelsea said with a sigh. “The things he said were harsh, but I know he only said them because he hadjust heard about his father’s death. I can’t be angry at him for what he said in a moment of grief.”
“But you are angry! If you weren’t, you wouldn’t have left the house the way you did.”
“No, I didn’t do that out of anger.” Chelsea picked up her glass of juice and swirled it slowly, wishing that she could have joined her friend in drinking wine. “I did it because… well, because I believe he meant what he said to me. He didn’t say it to hurt me, but when he told me that our arrangement was all for nothing now that his father isn’t going to see the baby born… I believe that.” She sighed. “I’m not mad about it, but I do think he doesn’t really want this anymore. Not the way he once did.”
“You really think he doesn’t want the baby?”
“It sounds so cold to say this,” Chelsea said slowly, “but the truth is… I don’t think he ever wanted a baby.Idid. But he wanted to give his father a grandchild, not to have a baby himself. And now he can’t do that. He’s right. Itwasall for nothing, as far as he’s concerned. And he’s stuck with the consequences for the rest of his life.”
“If that’s really how he feels about it, he’s a terrible person!” Heather fumed.
“No, he isn’t,” Chelsea said. “People have children for all kinds of reasons. He would be a terrible person if he wasn’t going to stand by me and take care of our baby, but he is going to do those things. I don’t have any doubt about that. The fact that he doesn’t want a child for sentimental reasons — that he doesn’t want to be a father — that doesn’t make him a bad man.”
“It kind of does, since he’shavinga child,” Heather insisted. “You are much more forgiving than he deserves, Chelsea, and I don’t understand why.”
“He never hid from me that we were only doing this to give Silas a grandchild. I always knew that.”
“That doesn’t mean you can’t be hurt by it,” Heather said, sympathy creasing her brow.
“No, I know that. That’s not what I’m saying. But I agreed to our arrangement knowing those were the terms.”
“The way you’ve been talking, though — the stories you’ve told me about him — it did seem like the two of you were seriously anticipating becoming parents together,” Heather said. “What about that big bear you told me he bought? That doesn’t seem like something a person would do if he didn’t care about becoming a father.”
“I know,” Chelsea said. “Believe me, I know. This is what I’ve been trying to figure out as long as I’ve known him. Sometimes he seems like the kindest man in the world, the best father anyone could hope to have for their child. And then, at other times, he’s so distant and disconnected that I can’t believe we’re going to be raising a kid together, and it doesn’t surprise me at all that he would turn away in a moment like this.”
“What do you think it all means?”
“Silas meant the world to him,” Chelsea said, staring into her glass. “I think he wants to be just like his father, and… he’s still figuring that out. He wants to make his father proud by having a child — but he wants to be a good father himself, too. But then, at the same time, he wants to be a good businessman like Silaswas, and he has more of an aptitude for business than he does for fatherhood. He’s more comfortable in that arena.”
