I fought, too, so hard, until I fell head over heels. I gave up everything—which wasn’t much when I looked at it now—to be with Cosimo. To be with the most dangerous man in the city. To marry the Italian Mafia boss.
On my wedding day, Alfarez was in tears, saying the same thing he said now; he could sneak me out. Maybe I should have listened.
I never regretted a day with Cosimo. I was well aware of the danger and consequences, but I fully gave him my heart. In return, he gave me the happiest days of my life and Mario. He even sacrificed his own life so his son and I could live. But if I didn’t marry Cosimo, if we didn’t have our baby, he’d have still been alive.
My chest contracted with the pain in my heart, and I fought so hard not to cry.
“Is it true?” Alfarez asked.
I blinked away the tears. “What?”
“It was an inside job?”
By the hands of his own twin. I nodded.
He squeezed my arms. “Why are you doing this?”
I lifted my shoulder in resignation. “Why do you think? Mario.”
“Bianca, you know I—”
“There’s no need for you to do anything. I’m marrying Enzio willingly. Nobody is forcing me into anything. It’s the right decision to make.”
He gritted his teeth. “You expect me to believe that? Bianca—”
“Please,” I pleaded.
A flare of curses flew off his mouth. Then he bent and reached inside his sock. When he straightened, something shiny appeared in his fist. A blade.
My eyes widened. “Papi, what the…”
He shoved the handle of the little knife inside my fist and asked me to hide it in Spanish. Then he leaned in for another hug. “In case you change your mind.”
“What?” I asked, dazed. How did he smuggle a weapon past the security? And what the hell was I supposed to do with this?
“The car and the men are right outside. I’ll take you and Mario to a place no one will ever find you. All you have to do is stab Enzio anywhere, and then run to the back exit of the hall.”
I let out a humorless chuckle. “You came prepared.”
“Always.”
I held his hand and placed the knife back in it. “Thanks, but I won’t need it. I know what I’m doing.” I couldn’t just run away. I needed to avenge my husband’s death. Every Lanza had to pay for what they’d done.
He pushed it back into my fist. “It won’t hurt if you keep it anyway. Who knows?”
A knock on the door made me jump. Reflexively, I slid the knife into my garter and fixed the dress quickly. The beauty team entered, and the stylist announced it was time.
I held my breath as they put on the finishing touches. Then I linked arms with Alfarez and headed out. Floral archways received us as we walked to the ceremony hall, the two bodyguards on my tail, and more when I arrived.
Closing my eyes for a second, I took a deep breath, and waited for my cue.Here Comes the Brideplayed and the doors swung open. Suddenly, the muscles around my heart squeezed painfully, and my feet weighed a ton. All my pep talks and mental preparations peeled away one by one until there were none, and I felt as if I was about to have a panic attack.
Suck it up. Just suck it up and move. You can’t back down now. Just fucking move.
Alfarez glanced at me and gave me a tight nod. Still, my feet refused to move. His breath fell next to my ear. “You’re going to be just fine. Just walk and remember what I said.”
I wished it’d been that easy, but I shook like a leaf in a storm. “You got me, right?”
He steadied me with his grip, taking down the trembling a bit. “Yes, mija. I’m always here for you.”
