‘It’s perfectly normal,’ Callum says.
‘Is it?!’
‘I didn’t have you down as a nervous flyer.’
‘I’m not a nervous flyer!’ I insist, although all the colour may have drained from my face. ‘I just … I don’t know. I wasn’t expecting it to be literally up and down.’
‘Take a breath,’ says Callum reassuringly. ‘Honestly, this is fine. I’ve experienced worse.’
‘You have? I’ve only ever flown short-haul before. Maybe I am a bit jittery,’ I concede.
‘Do you want some water?’ he offers, handing me a bottle.
‘Because … hydrating will help?’
‘Can’t not.’ He shrugs, motioning for me to drink some. ‘Take some steady breaths, too.’
I do as I’m told, feeling a little easier as the turbulence settles. Callum’s watchful eyes remain on me.
‘Thanks,’ I say with a wince. I then reach for the safety manual, realizing it’s high time I, too, acquainted myself with the ‘what to do in an emergency’.
‘Now she wants to read the instructions,’ Callum says to himself, amused.
I bristle.
‘I do wish you’d stop pointing out my seemingly endless number of flaws, Callum,’ I hiss. ‘We can’t all be perfect.’
‘You think I’m perfect?’
‘Yes. A perfect monster.’
‘And there I was about to invite you to tell me all about that meat queue you’ve been dying to talk about since this plane took off.’
I am seething at this. How dare he read me like a book?
‘Well, I’ve got news for you. You don’t deserve to hear my meet-cute story. It’s very sweet and you’d only taint it by listening.’
Callum is shaking his head.
I give up. Turning forwards, it’s my turn to demonstrably stick my earphones in as I choose the longest film I can find. The seatbelt sign is still on, and it’s quite clear that I’m neither going to be able to talk about Hamish nor go and find Hamish for the foreseeable. So be it. There’s the layover in Singapore. I’ll accost him there. Well, not accost, that sounds a bit much, but you know what I mean. And for now, I will rise above Callum Bang’s ever-annoying presence by being the bigger person and totally, utterly ignoring him. Two can play that game!
Oh man, this film is long and boring. I’m deeply regretting the decision to go for a ‘sweeping period drama’ when I could have gone for a more on-brand romcom and I am too stubborn to back out of it now. Callum and his eagle eyes are bound to spot it. At least I’m eating up some time, I think, pausing the film to check the plane’s progress. Five and a half hours in. Just another seven or eight until we get to Singapore!
I reach forward to tinker with my screen, mounted on the bulkhead wall in front of me, and find a flight map which shows where we are in real time. I love maps! I watch a mini version of this plane fly across the screen and peer at the city names popping up on the globe beneath it, trying to figure out where they are, but I don’t recognize many. And here I was thinking I was a geography buff. It’s my favourite topic at the pub quiz, alongside celebrity trivia. Penny covers literature and the arts. To be fair we rarely win but as my mum would say, it’s the taking part that counts.
The Caspian Sea comes into view on screen and I make a little ‘ooh’ noise. Now I know where we are! Right on the eastern tip of Europe. I peer out of the window but we’re way too high up to see any of it. I’ve always been fascinated by the Caspian Sea because, spoiler alert, it’s not actually a sea. It’s the largest inland body of water on the planet, a vast chunk of water surrounded by Azerbaijan and Russia to the west and Kazakhstan and Turkmenistan to the east. Iran to the south. And to see it on this map, it is, indeed, massive.
‘The Caspian Sea,’ says Callum, pausing his movie and pulling out his earphones. ‘Did you know it’s the—’
‘Largest inland body of water on the planet?’ I fill in.
‘I’ve always wanted to see it,’ Callum says, his eyes trailing from the map to me. ‘What’s up with your face?’
‘Why do people keep asking me that today?’ I frown.
‘Sorry,’ he holds his hands up. ‘It’s just that you’re looking quite, I don’t know, conflicted.’
Makes sense.
