I let out a humorlesslaugh.
"It's true. Michelle likes to pretend that she’s some badass chick who doesn’t need anybody, but it’s only because she has been hurt so manytimes.”
“I would neverhurther.”
“Maybe not intentionally, but what did you think was going to happen when you went back to school? It's what, seven hours to the panhandle? Did you think you’d visit each other on theweekends?”
The way she asked the question like it was the most preposterous thing in the world made me embarrassed because that was exactly what I envisionedhappening.
“Okay, so long distance is obviously out of the question. But what are we supposed to do? Drop out of school to be together? It's a little too Romeo and Juliet to me, and we both know how thatendedup.”
“I’m not suggesting that either. There’s not an easy or obvious solution here, Rainier. I just didn’t want you to think you were the only one hurting right now. Michelle was angry when she and Julian broke up. She went around saying awfulthings.”
“That’s what I’ve heard,” I mumbled under my breath. Somehow Avery managed to make out the words because she was quick to defendMichelle.
“She was upset, and she was embarrassed. Was it the best way to handle things? Obviously not. But the reason I even bring it up is that her reaction to this breakup of yours is different. I’ve known Michelle for a long time, and when she’s hurt, she refuses to talk about it. When I saw her earlier, she refused to talkaboutyou.”
I wasn’t sure what to do with Avery’s words. Part of me wanted to leap for joy. I wanted to know I wasn’t alone in these feelings. Michelle had seemed so cold when I went to herhouse.
But I didn’t want to rejoice in her suffering either. I liked Michelle, and I wanted the bestforher.
At that moment, sitting on the porch with her best friend, I knew what the best thing was for our situation was. I would let her go. It would be painful for a short time, for both of us. But we couldn’t throw our futures away for some summerfling.
“Do me a favor, and don’t tell Michelle about the song, okay? I think it’s best that we just leave things the waytheyare.”
Avery’s gaze was sad, but she nodded. “How long does it take to change a busted string anyway?” sheasked.
“Assuming anyone believed that, I should be backbynow.”
Avery stood up and turned back toward me. “Then I guess we’d better be gettinginside.”
The unnatural silence that met Avery and me when we walked back into Matt’s garage spoke volumes. Everyone knew exactly why I had walked out and had been discussing it while Avery and I had been having our conversationnextdoor.
Jenny and Carter refused to meetmyeyes.
However, Matt smiled at me and was the first one to speak up. “Rainier, I’m not going to ask you to open and up and sing Kumbaya with me or anything. But I know I’m speaking for the band when I say that song issomethingelse.”
“Thanks,” I answeredquietly.
“We need to tighten it up before Thursday’s show at TheImperial.”
“We’re not playing that song at TheImperial.”
“What are you talking about, man? That’s better than any of our other originals, and youknowit.”
“I shouldn’t have played it tonight because we can't playthatsong.”
Matt opened his mouth to argue, but Carter beat him to it. “A music scout is coming to the show this week,” he blurted from his place against the wall. Carter had one foot kicked up against the wall, and his head was bent toward theground.
“What?” Matt shouted. “How do you know this? Why didn’t you sayanything?”
The two of them began a back and forth. I didn’t care about whether or not someone in the industry was coming to listen or the reason why Carter hadn’t said something sooner. Matt, on the other hand, was pissed. This band was his dream, and he wanted to be in the loop about any possibilities for a bigbreak.
“You like her,” Jenny said, walking upbesideme.
What was with the girls tonight? I’d sung one ballad, and suddenly everyone knew all about my love life or lack thereof? This reaction was why my song would never see the light of day. I was right to keep my song private for so long. If only I'd been smart enough to keep itthatway.
“That’s what I keephearing.”
