I can’t tell Dad, though.
“We can announce the engagement is over,” I say confidently.
Blake and I are over, and frankly, I’ll do anything to move forward with Jack. Maybe that is what he needs to embrace this new arrangement.
“We should wait another week,” Dad urges.
His answer comes too quickly. Too easily. It does notfeellike a father trying to protect his daughter. He mentions marriage often. I can’t imagine he does not want that for me and Jack, yet I can’t help but wonder if there is something I am not seeing.
“I don’t think waiting is agood idea,” I say.
He looks at his reflection in the dressing room mirror. Service is about to start. “Will Jack be in the audience this time?”
“He won’t,” I answer softly. “I told him to stay home. I think he needs rest.”
Also a lie. I begged him to come, but he didn’t.
Dad barks out a laugh. “Can’t convert him if he doesn’t come to church.”
“That isn’t true.”
He glances over his shoulder, flashing a give-me-a-break smile.
“You look beautiful,” he deflects, then leads the way toward the stage. I follow dutifully, talking as we go.
“I know Jack. I believe in my heart, he will find his way back to God eventually.”
“Do not let him steal more of your time.” His voice lowers. “Does it not bring you pain to live in sin? Being unwed...” His voice trails off and his hands curl into fists.
My stomach sinks. I hate disappointing my father, but IloveJack.
“Being with someone else is what would bring me pain.”
Dad grunts, unconvinced. “Tell him what you want. He already knows from your beliefs.” His eyebrows lift as he says coolly, “Unless you are worried Jack cannot give you those things.”
The thought stabs.
“He wants the same things,” I assure blindly.
“Has he noticed your efforts to convert him?”
“I lead prayer at dinner. He doesn’t stop me.”
“That all?”
I frown.
A woman hooks on our microphones.
“Your mother and I love you,” he says before powering on the battery pack.
I return the sentiment, but his words of affection drive a stake into my heart. At Tybee Island, Jack spoke from his heart. Now I have to pry the words from him. They feel hollow coming from his lips. I bite down, my blood simmering.
It’s frustrating. He’s more guarded than before. If I could help him find his faith again, all of these problems would go away. He would feel loved.
My stomach lurches. Converting Jack shouldn’t feel wrong, but for some reason, it does. I used to think church was the answer to everything. Lately, I am not so sure.
I swallow my doubts and focus as I jog up the stage steps.
