“Aye, she was a wee bit of a witch, that one. She could always predict when I had an oncoming cold.”
“What did she say?”
“Oh, she always knew Nairie had a crush on you. But it was how you acted with her that made her think you’d end up together someday.”
I waited as Mum tested the opening and closing of the door we’d just fixed.
“Just small things only a mother would notice. She said there was a gentleness to you whenever Nairie was around. Like a fleeting smile whenever she’d sit withyou on the couch or the way your shoulders stopped hunching when you watched her paint or draw.”
I was dumbstruck. How did Lindsey know before I even realized it?
“So what happened?” Mum looked at me expectantly.
We got up off the floor and walked to the front of the barn, looking out at the pouring rain as guests ran to take cover inside the inn.
I tucked my hands in my pockets. “Her family is strict. They didn’t really approve when they found out, and she got scared.”
I breathed in the cold, wet air. The scent of grass and hay mingled together and soothed my aching chest. I still felt that seed of doubt that I was good enough for Nairie. It was hard not to replay what her parents said about me that day. The worst part was I knew they were right.
Mum joined me in looking out at the pasture, where puddles gathered in the grass like little lochs. “You’re a little rough around the edges, but you’re a good man, William. It doesn’t matter what anyone thinks except Nairie, and you’ve proven yourself to her many times over the years.” Mum grabbed my forearm in a rare act of affection. “Don’t let your past determine your future happiness, son. You’ve more than made up for the things you did when you were younger.”
I looked into her crystal blue eyes. They held a strong conviction. It was the kind of look that often instilled hope that maybe our lives would improve. It’d been a while since I could trust in her hope. I desperately wished she would be right this time.
Chapter 21
Nairie
After a couple of weeks, Baba was on the mend, and I was back to living in my parents’ house to help take care of him. Things were still strained between us, but they didn’t bring up William, and I went along as if I’d never moved out in the first place. Now my time with William felt more and more like a dream.
I’d been speechless as I watched William leave the hospital waiting room. All I wanted to do was roll up in a ball and cry. I wanted William to stay but also wanted him to move on. It was the right thing to do, even if it tore me apart. I was confused, tired, and sad.
Everything felt muted without him around. I was ashamed of how I pushed him away, but I focused all my energy on making Baba better. It was easier to do that than to face the chasm of despair.
Elspeth stopped by to visit regularly, and today, we were in the garden, soaking up the sun and drinking iced tea.
“So.” Elspeth lolled her head to the side to look at me. “I’ve been avoiding asking you this until your dad was in better shape, but has William contacted you at all?”
I looked back at her as she continued to bask in the sun. “He texted me once when he landed.”
“What did he say?”
“He said he’d still be there for me. Whenever I’mready. And that he loves me.”
“Did you respond?”
“I can’t.”
“What are you afraid of?”
My eyes brimmed with hot tears, and I swiped them away. “Hurting my parents. They’ll never accept us together.”
Elspeth sighed and held my hand. “Do you love him?”
I avoided her stare and looked at a small bird pecking crumbs off the ground. “It doesn’t matter.”
She turned to fully face me. “I’ve never seen either of you so happy. And you’ve only had like, what, one panic attack since you’ve been together? And even then, he helped you through it. He’s good for you, Nairie. Isn’t it obvious?”
“I know. But it’s not worth the stress it’ll cause my parents.”
