A moment later, he’s gone.
Thedarkcloudfromearlier follows me back to my towel. I’m sad, upset, anxious, guilty … you name it. I feel Aidan watching as I settle back on the sand and proceed to flip loudly through my magazine, stewing over the fact that other people know before Matt does.
I blow out a harsh breath.
I’m pissed … but mostly at myself.
It was unfair of me to expect Riley to keep this in for so long. It’s understandable he might need to talk to someone about it. Someoneotherthan me. Especially considering all the roadblocks I keep putting up between him and his son. I don’t know how Matty is going to take this news—or Alex, for that matter. I’ve lied to them their whole lives. I might have thought it was the right thing to do at the time, but things have changed. This all stems from fear, and I need to get a handle on it before I do irrevocable damage to the people I love.
“Holy shit, look at her go!” Joe exclaims, pulling me from my brooding thoughts and drawing my eyes to the lake where Tessa, Aidan, and Noah are racing in the water. Luke had left for a short while and returned with Tessa after she finished her shift at The Bean.
“Told you,” he declares smugly, and with more than a hint of pride in his voice. “She’s an incredible swimmer.”
We watch from our beach towels on the sand as Tessa leaves the men in her dust, beating them to the buoy floating out beyond the drop off, rounding it easily, and then gliding smoothly past them in the other direction as she makes her way back towards land. For a woman who was in a coma little more than sixmonths ago, she sure is graceful in the water, her athletic arms stroking confidently through the waves.
“Woohoo,” Lucy calls from her spot beside me as Tessa, dripping wet, strides up the beach towards us with the men behind her still swimming to shore. “Girl power, Tessa baby!!”
She grins and drops to her towel.
“Where’d you learn to swim like that?” Lucy asks, then freezes, eyes widening as Piper leans over and smacks her lightly on the shoulder. “Ohh, sorry, T,” she breathes. “Dumb question.”
Tessa gets a faraway look, biting her lip before turning to us and smiling again, this time a little sadly. “I wish I knew,” she says with a shrug.
Lucy’s face drops. “I’m so sorry to bring that up. I can’t imagine how hard this is for you.”
Piper nods. “I know you don’t know us very well yet, but if you ever want to talk about anything, we’re here, and we’re good listeners.”
Tessa sighs, but offers us a small smile. “Thanks. That’s what’s so crazy, though. You ladies have all been so sweet and welcoming, and I appreciate it so much—but the reality is I don’t knowanyone, aside from Luke. We’ve gotten pretty close over the last few months, and honestly, he’s been a godsend. But I have no idea if there’s anyone else out there. If there’s anyone looking for me … or …” she swallows thickly, “missing me.”
I reach over and rub a hand soothingly up her arm. Tessa nods her thanks and continues. “Do I have friends out therewondering where I am and if I’m okay?” Her voice cracks. “Do I have a family?” She trails her eyes wistfully over our friends and family, spread out in small groupings across the beach. I follow her gaze as she looks at Matt and Alex, heads together on their towels, smiling at something on one of their phones; at Noah, now with Cece strapped securely to his chest, as he moves to join the other men standing in the surf with beers; at Henry laughing with Jack and Nora, still in their lawn chairs.
“You ladies are so lucky,” Tessa says, and I feel her words down to my bones. “You have such an amazing group of people here, and it’s obvious how much you all love and care for each other.”
Lucy nods. “Found family.”
“Exactly,” Piper agrees. “I had no one before I came to Llyn Lakes. Now I have so many friends who are family, and family who are friends.”
And isn’t that the truth? Riley was right when he said I have an incredible support system around me. And I should be leaning on them more, I think, as I resolve to finally let them in on my secrets. Soon.
“You’re a part of the group now,” I tell Tessa. “You may not know who else is out there, but here, you have us.”
Piper and Lucy make noises of agreement, and Tessa brightens, smiling at us sweetly.
“Thank you,” she breathes. “You have no idea how much that means to me.”
Lucy calls for a group hug, and the four of us lean in only marginally awkwardly as we kneel in the sand, laughing as we embrace.
Itakeinaslow,deep lungful of fresh air, letting the setting sun and the steady sound of the soft waves lapping at the shore soothe my mind. We watch the men standing around at the water’s edge, chatting and laughing. Pinks and peaches splash across the sky behind them, making it the perfect backdrop for the sweet scene that unfolds as Noah, still with baby Cece strapped to his chest, leans in and presses his face to her head. As a parent, I know full well he’s breathing in the scent of his little one, that perfect baby smell that instantly rearranges your priorities—your very being—and spells instant bliss.
“I want one of those,” Piper says on a sigh.
“You can’t have him,” Lucy jokes.
Piper rolls her eyes. “I already have one ofthose,” she points at Noah. “I want one ofthose,” she corrects, gesturing lower to where Cece is now patting her father’s face. Her light giggle carries across the water, and I laugh too, feeling my mood lighten a little.
“Have you guys talked about it?” I ask her.
She sighs. “Yeah. We’ve decided we want to wait another year. Possibly two. We want to take some more time for ourselves first. Maybe do some traveling. Still, I’m looking forward to it when the time is right.”
