I want to know, I realize.
I really want to know. I really–
Oh my God.
I think I’m going to do it.
I think–
Yeah, I think …
I’m going to be a mother.
???
“Thanks, Sheila, I appreciate it,” I say, hopping down from the exam bench. Doctor Sheila Burns has been my family doctor since I was a teen and she insists all her patients call her by her first name. She’s nearing retirement now and I’ll be sad to see her go. It occurs to me that it’s unlikely she’ll still be around to serve as my child’s doctor, and it’s crazy that I’m even thinking it, but here we are.
I’m going to have a kid.
With Noah.
Now I just have to tell him.
“Of course, honey, happy to help. And congratulations.” She nods, offering me a soft smile. “I’ll put through the referral paperwork to the OB-GYN I mentioned, Doctor Lee, this afternoon. Her office should be in touch with you in a day or so to set up an appointment. It’s likely that she’ll want to do an ultrasound at that time so be prepared for that.”
“Okay. Will do,” I murmur.
An ultrasound.
This is really real.
I make my way out of the building and over to my car in a sort of daze. I feel surprisingly good though, now that I’ve come to a decision. Talking things over with Sheila made everything feel much more real, and despite the fear that still lingers, I know I’ve made the right choice. I’ve done lots of hard things before, and I can do this too.
I curve a palm over my stomach, shielding it from the steering wheel as I climb into the car.Aaaandthen I sit there for a moment in shock that I justdidthat. And I did it subconsciously, without a second thought, as though it was completely natural. My lips tip up in a small private smile. Turns out, I’m already feeling protective of the little bean.
Huh.
How about those maternal instincts!?
I turn on the car and when my Bluetooth kicks on I dial up Noah.
He answers on the first ring.
“Lucy, are you okay? Is everything alright?” the concern in his voice is touching and causes my chest to tighten.
I clear my throat. “I’m good, I’m good. Just left the doctor’s office and it’s confirmed. There’s most definitely a little bun in this oven.”
He whooshes out a breath.
“Noah?” I ask after a moment.
“Yeah?”
“Okay.”
A pause.
“Okay?”
