I should have been fucking Negan. Not Theodore.
Fuck.
Shit. Next time?
My eyes burn with every blink, the brown contacts scratching just enough to keep me aware of them, the glasses perched on my nose already pushing my patience to its limit, and when I think about my hair slicked back so hard I look like I’m losing it, I have to fight the urge to laugh.
Stay in character.
Good evening, my name is Theodore, the clitoris is a myth.
The thought makes my lip curl.
Sera’s face hits me without warning, not from earlier when she tried to hold herself together in front of everyone, but from last night when she couldn’t anymore, when her hands clutched at my shirt and her body shook against mine, when her tears soaked into my skin as she begged me not to leave her, her voice breaking in a way that carved itself into something permanent inside my chest.
I shove the memory down before it can take hold, because there is no room for hesitation now, not when I’m already standing in the middle of this, surrounded by people who would gladly see me burn if they knew exactly who I was.
I keep moving.
I force my way forward through the crowd, shoulder to shoulder with people who believe every word they’re about to hear, letting the signs they hold catch my attention just enough to blend in while I read them without really wanting to.
THE LORD SEES ALL.
Even when I am balls deep?
Nice.
Nice.
REPENT OR BURN.
I mean, that could be a sign for smart sexual health. Don’t get the clap. Bag it up or feel the burn!
THE LOST WILL BE CLEANSED.
Oh, well, at least they will be found and cleaned. That’s nice. Charitable.
My gaze shifts, catching on another.
TREY BAKER = SIN.
Fuck, yes! I am going to make that into a t-shirt. That is fucking hilarious.
I look to the left.
TREY BAKER — THE DESTROYER WALKS AMONG US.
Destroyer of pussies and assholes…fuck. I shouldn’t be walking around this crowd with a semi. Then again… that’s like religious rapture.
I am hard for God.I bite my lip. Do not laugh. Do. Not. Laugh.
You are going to hell.
A laugh almost breaks free before I can stop it.
I bump into the guy holding it, deliberate enough to throw him off balance, and when he scowls at me, I nod toward the sign like we’re in on the same joke.
“Yeah,” I say, keeping my tone casual. “He’s the worst. Hot piece of ass, though.” I say with a wink.
