I hurried downstairs, my swollen cock hanging between my legs and their release still hot on my skin. Soon enough, I’d be leaving them there and not coming back, and for some fucked-up reason, my damn memory went straight back to when I was seventeen, and my mom told me I had to find somewhere else to live.
I rubbed my eyes, frustrated, then grabbed a few towels from the side closet and used one to wipe myself off. Exhausted from sex, it was like I didn’t have the strength to hold off all the emotions that rose up when I thought about my guys, good and bad and everything in between.
I wanted to run up the stairs and jump back in bed with them. As soon as I felt their bare skin against mine, I could pretend it was all good again. But as I filled up a couple waters, I admitted that wasn’t working like it used to.
I needed to walk away soon. Blake and Russell had a real shot at a future together, and I needed to extract myself before I fucked that up for them. I might have been a loner, but they weren’t, and it wouldn’t be fair of me if I screwed up their chance for real happiness.
I stepped back into Blake’s room. They were both naked, with Russell sprawled out against Blake’s bigger body, looking just perfect together. I handed off the towels, then set the waters on the table.
“You can help clean me up,” Russell said with a slight tease in his voice. “If you want to.”
Fuck. I knew something was off when I said no to an offer like that.
I forced a grin. “Tempting. But I figured we all probably have an appetite. I’ll make some dinner?”
It was the best way I could think to show them how I felt. And outside of sex and hanging with Blake, cooking was about the only surefire way I knew to make myself feel better. Maybe I shouldn’t crawl up against them and fall asleep, but I could at least feed them.
“I’m starving, actually,” Blake said. “You sure you don’t just want to order in, though? I’ll pay.”
I leaned down, then indulged in another quick kiss from both of them. “You know those restaurants can’t compare to what I got. You two relax. I’ll holler when the food is ready.”
And then I walked away, because no matter how bad it hurt, I knew it was what I had to do.
