Jack stepped away from Declan, clearly taken aback. No one spoke for a moment.
It was Patricio who braved the silence. ‘I’m going to head back on board.’
Stuart jumped on the life raft. ‘Me too,’ he said, jogging after Patricio.
Petra turned to Sofia. ‘Do you want me to leave you?’
Sofia knew that this was her mess to sort out. She nodded. Petra shot Jack a look.
‘Let’s try and remember that it takes two to tango, Jacky. If there is to be any blame, you can’t lay it all at Sofia’s door.’ When Jack didn’t respond, she waited, hands on her hips.
‘Yeah OK, sure,’ he muttered finally. Petra didn’t look satisfied by the response but she took it, running to catch up with the others.
Sofia was left with Declan and Jack.How had it cometo this?she wondered.
Jack didn’t even look at Sofia when he said stonily, ‘I see you took it upon yourself to tell everyone about...’ He paused and she held her breath. She wanted to know more than anything what exactly he thought last night had been. ‘Us,’ he concluded, and she let out the breath, none the wiser.
‘Well, after you took it upon yourself to tell the captain, it seemed only fair that everyone else should know too.’ She felt defiant; maybe it was the shots still coursing through her blood. She wasn’t going to just lie back and take it.
Jack scoffed, ‘Oh right, like I was the one who ran away?’
‘I went to make us coffee, Jack.’ Sofia was indignant. Jack’s expression flickered, the stony mask slipping for a moment, and Sofia thought she spotted something like surprise, or maybe regret.
Their exchange was interrupted by a loud sob coming from Declan. ‘I want to talk to Sofia.’ He sounded like a toddler having a tantrum.
Sofia took one last look at Jack. He didn’t say anything, just ran his hand through his hair exasperatedly. It was up to her to fix this mess, it seemed. She sat down tentatively next to Declan. He wrapped his arms around her, the bottle falling into the water below with a loud splash. Declan buried his head in the nape of her neck and started crying softly. Sofia pulled him closer.
‘I’ll leave you two to it.’
‘OK.’ She didn’t turn around as Jack walked off.
Chapter Thirty-Six
Sofia waited until Declan’s cries had quietened. She wondered if all charters were this dramatic. Something about the close quarters and proximity to so much water seemed to bring everyone closer to tears. She pulled away so that she could turn to look at him.
‘Tell me what’s going on, Declan.’
He sniffed, scrubbing at his eyes and nose. ‘I don’t really know, Sofia. I’m so confused. Everything is so... intense.’
‘Preaching to the choir,’ she said dryly.
‘I don’t know what’s going on with you and Jack, but I really liked you, Sofia, and I thought I was over it or whatever but...’ He hung his head.
‘I wasn’t thinking, Declan. I’m sorry. I was so wrapped up with it – I mean, I’m probably as confused as you.’ Sofia didn’t know what else so say. She felt overwhelmed by the seesawing. Every relationship she had on this boat seemed to be in constant flux; it was hard to know where you stood.
‘I’ve never liked a girl like that before,’ Declan said quietly. Sofia’s heart heaved. ‘If I tell you something, can you promise to keep it a secret?’
It was the least she could do. ‘Of course,’ she said.
Declan looked scared for a moment and then determined. ‘Usually, I like boys.’ He searched her face as if expecting a certain reaction. ‘I’ve never said that out loud to anyone before.’
Sofia smiled encouragingly. ‘That’s OK, Declan, thanks for telling me.’
‘Except it’s not really OK. I can’t tell my parents, or my sisters. They always say that “all that stuff is for white people”.’ It might not have been completely appropriate but Sofia couldn’t help but let out a yelp of laughter. She was grateful to see Declan crack a smile.
‘You might be surprised, you know. Parents say all sorts of stuff about other people, but when it’s their own kids, it’s usually a different story.’
‘Maybe.’ He shrugged. ‘I think part of me was really relieved that I finally fancied a girl.’ He looked suddenly bashful. ‘Sorry, a woman.’ Sofia reached out and squeezed his hand.
