“He won’t talk to me.” Koda looks uncomfortable. “He’s still out there, though. I saw his car the other day, but when I went to talk to him, he cussed me out. He’s not doing great.”
“Well, that’s called karma.”
Koda looks at me. “Look, I get this whole thing is fucked up. I know it is. But you don’t know Aiden the way I do.”
“That’s a fucking understatement, no?”
“No, listen to me. I met Aiden when his mother got with my dad. I was only eight. His mother sold him into this life. She used him as leverage. All my life he’s acted like a dick to me, but I know the truth.”
“What’s that?”
“Aiden has protected me since the day I met him. He won’t ever admit it, but I know that’s why he was wrapped up in this shit. If he did shit for Ivan, I didn’t have to. If I fucked up, he took the fall for me. If there was a dangerous job, he’d volunteer to do it. Aiden loves deeply. He might not express it outwardly, but you can feel it, and you can be pissed all you want, but I know you do feel it.”
No. This is insane. “He tried to steal from me.”
“For her. For our sister. And I’m sorry, but Ivan was coming here one way or another. You’re lucky it was Aiden. That night he came to your apartment with those wounds? I did that to him. Ivan forced me to.” My eyes snap to him. “He took the fall for me, said he took Katya on his own while I was watching her. He took the fall for me, and I had to whip him for saving me. You can be pissed, but there are things we’ve had to do all our lives to survive.”
“Why are you telling me all this?”
“Because it’s my turn to protect him. What he did is fucked up, but it’s a mistake if you think Aiden had a choice. You’re lucky you didn’t grow up like we did. Your mother saved you. Aiden protected you. We only had orders, and Aiden betrayedhis because he’s in love with you. Now he’s in the middle of the woods, probably waiting to die because he hurt you. He hasn’t even been by to see her, and I need one of you to get your shit together and help me with Katya. She can’t go to a home, but I’m not fit to raise her.”
“What do you want me to do?”
“Take her. I need you to take her.”
“I can’t raise a kid, I?—”
“Think about it, okay? Just think about it. Kenji’s patience is wearing thin. I need one of you to take her. She can’t live where I’m going, alright? We have no other family. Think about it, Sawyer. Is that what you want for her?”
“That’s not fair.”
“Welcome to my life. To Aiden’s life. Do you really want her going into foster care?”
I glare at Koda, but I already know my answer.
No, I don’t.
I knock softly,waiting at the door. Koda’s words haven’t left my mind all day. I know it’s late, but I really need to talk to someone. I hate bothering him, but I need this. I took a rideshare here, and now wonder if I should just have texted him.
After a moment the door opens, and Hunter is standing in a pair of boxers frowning at me. “Everything alright?”
“No,” I admit. I’m minutes from breaking down and I don’t want to hide anymore. I’m miserable, and Koda’s visit didn’t help. This wound had barely stitched together and Koda just opened it all back up again.
Instead of saying anything else, he grabs me in a hug and squeezes me tight. I cling to him and lose it. Everything feels so heavy. I hate it.
After a moment I pull away, wiping my eyes. “Sorry.”
He smiles kindly at me. “Never say sorry. Come in.” I follow him inside and take off my shoes. I see Mark sleeping on the couch, a movie playing on the TV. “Sorry, I know it’s late.”
“Don’t worry about him. This house could fall down around us and he wouldn’t wake up. Do you know that Noah slept between us once and he never even woke up?”
“Do I want to ask?”
Hunter laughs. “No. Probably not.”
“I know it’s late.”
“It’s never too late for you, man.” He looks back toward the kitchen. “Let me change and we can go outside. Go help yourself to a drink. I’ll be right out.”
