“Who the fuck are you?” I ask as the rage lowers to a simmer.
“The man who’s going to leave you walking funny.” Benji abruptly lets go of me and gives me a gentle shove. I stumble back in confusion, but he only nods towards the stairs. “Go to your room. Hands and knees on the rug in front of the fireplace. I’ll be there in a second.”
“No.”
Benji grins, wide, and just a little mean. “Don’t test me.”
“No,” I repeat, this time unwilling to move.
Benji crosses his arms over his broad chest. “Fine. Then we’re going to talk through our limits. I’ve got your brief, but I want to hear it from you. No hard limits? Bullshit.”
My chest heaves in anger. “Excuse me?”
“Your hard limit is giving up control. You didn’t like me ordering you around just then, did you? What else didn’t you like? If you don’t tell me, then I might repeat it. I’m not much in the mood for unnecessary mistakes.”
Yeah, fuck this guy. I pick up the glass of water on the island, and throw it at the ground so that it shatters into tiny pieces. Water sprinkles the floor, a river flowing through the jagged, broken edges. The rage inside me disappears into a cloud of embarrassed smoke. Turning around in a fury, I flee downstairs to the bedroom. Huffing and puffing, I look for more things I can break. But my bedroom has been carefully curated to be absent of anything breakable.
The soft padding of Benji’s footsteps echoes down the stairs behind me. For some reason, the idea of him not cowering in the face of my tantrum calms me. Most people would flinch and run the other way at my bad behavior. It’s a learned assumption after so many years. Act out, people leave me alone. They don’tlook close after I’ve behaved like a toddler with their favorite toy taken away.
Benji pauses just inside the room, hands carefully hidden in the pockets of his sweatpants as if afraid to reach out for me. Good. He should be.
“Don’t speak to me like that in my own home,” I tell him loudly, just barely avoiding a shout.
Benji nods in understanding. “Okay. But you’ve got to tell me what you like, what you don’t. I’ll never know how to give you what you want if you just act out instead of communicating like an adult.”
“Fuck you.”
Benji shakes his head with a tired sigh. “Alright, Nolan.”
I cross the distance between us in a flurry of limbs and my mouth is on his before I can even blink. He tastes like sweet tea. I didn’t even realize I had any in the fridge. Benji backs us up towards the rug and shoves me down until my back hits the ground hard enough to make me gasp, my mouth breaking from Benji’s. His normally light blue eyes are a shade darker, frighteningly intense as he stares down at me in the shimmery orange glow of the warm fire.
He slowly dips down to nuzzle at my throat. Pleasure rolls through me when his lips feather over my pulse. I dig my blunt nails into the bare skin of his back when his teeth bite into my skin hard enough to send my eyes rolling back into my head. Oh yeah, that’s the stuff. He rolls his hips against mine so that our cocks slide together through our clothes. Fuck, he feels so good against me, his heavy weight pushing me down. I’ve missed this so much.
“We need a safe word,” Benji mumbles into the tense air between us.
“No.”
Benji’s eyes flash and his movements freeze. “Yes. Pick one or this stops now. And I have to know you’ll use it. I’m serious.”
Why is this guy always fucking pushing me? His stare is hard, his thighs even harder against the sweaty skin of my own as I wonder if this is really worth a fight. Pick a safe word and get fucked or don’t and lose whatever this is with Benji. Fuck.
“Azure,” I bite out. It’s the color of Benji’s fucking perfect annoying eyes. The last thing I ever want to say.
Benji’s teeth flash white in the dark room just before dipping down to bite at my neck. Fuck. Sharp pain shoots down my arm, sending a dizzying rush of euphoria through me. Benji breaks away from my neck to take my lips in another burning kiss. His tongue slides into my mouth, tangling with my own as his fingers tug at my hair. He rolls his hips again and I have to bite back a whimper that so badly wants to break loose.
“Fuck me, you motherfucker,” I whisper against Benji’s mouth, just before biting down hard on his lip.
Benji’s fingers disappear from my hair to trail over the burning skin of my back. His hands come to rest on my ribs, a seemingly favorite place to rest them. Rising up on his knees, he stares hungrily down at me.
“Lift up,” Benji orders, and for some stupid reason, I obey like a total lemming. He rips off my sweatpants, leaving me nude under his heated gaze. His eyes rake over me as his throat bobs, seemingly overcome while looking at me. Blue gaze locking with mine, the world tilts dangerously sideways.
Benji rolls to standing, muscles flexing with the fluid motion. Stepping out of his own pants, he falls back to his knees between my splayed legs. His large palms slide up my inner thighs in quiet reverence, causing goose bumps to appear in their heavy wake. Benji’s eyes lift back up to meet my questioning gaze.
“Tell me what the tattoos mean?” Benji asks softly as his stare is fixed on the blooming flowers across my ribs.
I swallow roughly against the emotion threatening to choke me. “Life can come from something decaying if you only let it.”
Benji tenderly sweeps his thumbs over the flowers tangled with my ribs. “What’s decaying?”
