“Again, where’s the fucking remorse?” She snarled. “How are you gonna stand here and basically tell me that you intentionally got her pregnant when you were still my nigga?”
“Look,” I breathed out. “I need you to stop this. At this point, I’m beyond catering to your feelings. I had apologized way back then. But I wasn’t your nigga, at that time. That whole summer, you never saw me. I didn’t call you or nothing. I didn’t even bother lying to you when you finally saw her and asked if I was fucking her. Since the time she moved into this house, she been with me. I know that’s fucked up to hear, but that’s what it is. She my gal, and that’s not finna change for you or nobody else. Her having Junior didn’t break me and you up. Shit, I didn’t even know she was pregnant, when I called it quits with you. But you go around making it seem like I’m only with her because of Junior. And that shit rubs me the wrong way. And then when we interact, you wanna talk about me not being with you. Or how Raven is livingyourlife. I know that’s your position, because you’ll always see it as I was yours first. So, you aint gotta respect my relationship. And that you somehow trump Raven. That’s your attitude, and that’s why I keep my distance. Really, Ion be trying to fuck with these hoes…but sometimes…the persistence wears me down. I won’t lie. But I aint got no history with those hoes. I aint gotta explain why I’m at where I’m at. And I refuse to entertain a broad that don’t know her place in my life. Those other girls know that Raven is my gal. There’s no debating that, and they move accordingly. Meanwhile, you think that you aint gotta respect boundaries. Like when Raven answers the phone and you boldly ask to speak to me. That causes unnecessary confusion, and we both know that it’s about your ego. Like you can’t even be honest with yourself. You want her to believe that she aint number one, becauseyouaint number one. It’s like it’s yourmission to be disrespectful and stir up drama. Which is why I keep my distance.”
“So, basically, I gotta pretend that you being with Raven don’t hurt me, and then we can be cool again?”
“Nah.” I shook my head. “I aint asking you to pretend. We can easily see each other around and go the other way.”
“Really?” She placed a hand on her hip.
“Yeah, really.”
She sighed. “We both know that I’d never just walk past you, Jahrein.”
“Then you need to adjust to reality.”
She nodded. “I hear you.”
“Good,” I exhaled. “But uh…I gotta head in.” I turned towards my house.
“Jahrein.”
“Yeah.” I groaned, while pausing, never bothering to look back.
“We needed this talk. I heard you. Everything. So, the next time you see me, it’ll be nothing but smiles and good energy. Your relationship will be completely off limits. Cause I just want my friend back, for real.”
I nodded, hoping that she meant that, although deep down, I knew that she didn’t. “Bet.”
With nothing else to be said, I moseyed into the crib. Not surprisingly, the house had settled down, most of the lights were off, and everybody had retired to their rooms.
When I stepped into our room, I found Raven laying on her side, while Jahrein Junior was tucked under the cover, laying next to her. As always, she’d waited up for me.
“Good.” She immediately sat up. “’Bout time you came in at a decent hour on a school night. You got finals tomorrow,” she reminded me.
“Yeah, I do.” I yawned, as I watched Junior squirm under the cover. “But let’s go to the bathroom. I aint trying to wake my lil’ nigga up.”
She nodded, while easing out of bed. As always, she was rocking one of my oversized tees that nearly reached her knees. “Come on.” She marched around me, stepping out into the hallway.
Doing a about-face, I followed her to the bathroom, before we locked ourselves inside.
“Huhn.” I handed her a bag of weed, needing to say nothing more.
Sitting on the toilet, she started rolling up. “I checked the mail today,” she rambled, while focusing on the task at hand. “Colleges are still reaching out to you.”
I leaned against the countertop. “I know.”
“Okay…” She stressed. “And you’re seriously not gonna take none of them into consideration?”
I stared at her. “Nah.”
Sucking her teeth, she lifted her head. “Why not?”
“Cause. We already talked about this. All of them offers is for out of state.”
“So, what?”
“So, I’m not finna leave you and Junior behind.”
She sighed, while running her fingers through her messy hair. “I really wish that you’d stop saying that. It’s bad enough that I hear people whispering about it. Everybody feels like I got you walking away from your dreams. Meanwhile, I keep telling you that you have my blessings to go off to college.”
