A growl, elemental and utterly thrilling, leapt from his body and straight into hers as he deepened the kiss. She swallowed it with a helpless moan and wound her arms more securely around his neck. Because, dear God, her husband had sparked a flame inside her that threatened to turn into quite the inferno. How had she survived for so long without this?
The only reasonable answer was she’d forgotten how good it could be when a man and a woman shared a mutual desire. Her grief and the responsibility she’d had to raise her daughter had made her ignore her own needs. And heaven help her she needed this – needed Devlin – more than she needed her next breath.
“Christ, you taste good,” he whispered near her ear moments later after kissing a path along her jawline. He nipped her lobe, causing a series of shivers to dart through her body. “And you feel incredible.” As if to illustrate this, he lowered his hand to her bottom and pulled her flush up against him.
“Dev!” Her tone surprised her, for it didn’t convey the outrage she knew she ought to show in response to the blatant proof of his lust. Instead, it was raspy with need and an urgent yearning for him to help her block out the past. She didn’t care how, she just had to feel, to let him take her away from the awful memories in which she’d been drowning for so very long.
“God you’re stunning.” His voice was hoarse – strained even. And then he crushed her mouth with his and kissed her hard, replacing every thought in her head with the knowledge that she was wanted.
It was impossible for her not to bask in all the glorious sensations he stirred in her body.
Shuddering with pleasure, she returned Devlin’s kiss with equal fervor, allowing him to know she was just as needy as he.
And yet, she could not allow them to take this further. Already, there was no denying he’d likely be left in a state of discomfort unless they retired to their cabin and she let him claim her. Only she wasn’t quite ready for that – wasn’t sure when, or even if, she would be. And that piece of stark awareness made her feel awful. Because she’d used him for her own satisfaction, without any thought to the consequences and without considering him or his feelings.
Selfish. That was what she was. Horrible. Without a doubt the most awful person she’d ever known. And still, she continued to kiss him until he leaned back and pulled her roughly against him, holding her tight.
“I’m sorry,” she muttered against his shoulder.
“Whatever for?” A choked laugh escaped her. Was he really going to force her to explain? She tried to formulate the right words, but then, before she had a chance to answer, he said, “I’m not sorry for any of it, Cass. If anything, I’m delighted to learn how well you respond to my touch.”
“But you probably…um…I mean…er.”
The horrid man actually chortled.Chortled!“You needn’t worry. I’ll never insist you do something for which you’re not ready. And I have a feeling it may be a while before you are ready for everything I have to offer.”
He dropped his gaze for a second, then returned it to hers and raised an arrogant brow.
Cassandra pursed her lips. “You’re incorrigible. Do you know that?”
He nudged her and jutted his chin toward the other end of the ship. “You should probably go and check on Penelope.”
“But what about you? I mean, aren’t you coming with me?”
He snorted. “Not in this state.”
Cassandra considered his appearance. Apart from his hair being slightly ruffled, he looked the same as usual. “You’re sure?”
“Quite.” He winced as if in pain, then schooled his features and regarded her with the utmost seriousness. “You should go. Right now. Before I lose whatever restraint I possess and do something reckless.”
The strain of his voice revealed that he was wound tighter than a new spool of thread, and close to unraveling at any second. Understanding his meaning, Cassandra gave a quick nod and turned on her heel. When she climbed into bed ten minutes later after finding Penelope fast asleep, she could not stop from wondering what it would be like to simply surrender – to abandon her inhibitions and let herself lie with Devlin.
The memory of the kiss they’d shared and the pleasure he’d brought her while holding her in his arms filled her with even more longing.
It wasn’t until she woke the following morning that she remembered. For the first time since Timothy’s death, she’d forgotten to speak her vow before drifting off to sleep. And nothing could have made her hate herself more.
Chapter 11
As usual whenever he sailed,Devlin slept only three hours. He’d gone to bed a while after sending Cassandra back to their cabin and was now awake before her, allowing him the satisfaction of watching her face while she slept. He still couldn’t quite grasp the fact that she was his wife or the enthusiasm with which she’d kissed him last night. Yes, she’d been hesitant at first, perhaps unsure, but then, once she’d made her decision, she’d unveiled a passionate side he could scarcely wait to explore further. Hell, it had taken his body a good half hour to accept that it wouldn’t be getting what it wanted anytime soon.
Slowly, he reminded himself. They had time –plenty of it in fact – and they’d made a tremendous stride in the right direction. So as long as he didn’t push her too hard or make demands before she was ready, he was certain they’d soon be exploring each other more intimately.
A devilish smile curved his lips as he went to wash and get dressed. He couldn’t wait to see her naked, to bury himself in her heat and send her soaring.
Dropping his gaze, he groaned. Just the thought of it, however brief it had been, had put him in a state once again. He glanced at the window and the cold ocean beyond. With a sigh, he grabbed a book on common diseases found aboard ships and how to treat them, and prepared to wait for his body – or a certain part of it – to relax.
It was almost four by the time he made his way to the galley for breakfast after checking on Monty, who’d taken over the helm right before Devlin had gone to bed. Once he’d eaten, Devlin would relieve his friend so he could get some much needed rest.
He entered the gun deck and glanced around. Ordinarily, Talbot was already bustling about at this hour, getting food ready for four o’ clock, when half the crew finished their watch and the other half rose to start theirs. But all was quiet. The stove wasn’t even lit and…
