Griffin latched onto her unspoken words with every hope he’d ever had. “Before what?”
She raised her chin, defiance now firmly in place. “It doesn’t matter.”
And before he could tell her that he was quite certain it did, she reminded him that her mother was waiting and that he was still quite welcome to join them both for the picnic.
“I would like that,” he said, both because he was hungry and felt a need for fresh air, but also because he wanted to keep on studying her. She’d held back something important, of that he was certain. Especially since she’d let slip that resisting him wasn’t easy. Which meant he was right. She wanted him just as much as he wanted her. Now all he had to do was convince her that she could have him forever and that he would make her happy.
Sittingon the blanket beside her mother and pretending that Griffin’s presense was as unremarkable as it would have been if he’d been anyone else, was difficult. For three days Emily had managed to keep her distance from him. It had helped that he’d hidden himself away in the parlor, but at the same time, his frequent absenses had made her forget how gorgeous, charming, and thoroughly tempting he was.
When she’d foolishly touched him in the parlor and then allowed him to touch her, sparks had erupted inside her, awakening every dream she’d ever had of being wanted, desired, loved.
The last bit was what had slammed the door between them. It was what made her fearful of surrender. The knowledge that if he so much as kissed her again, it might break her heart.
Her mother offered her a slice of apple, and Emily accepted, biting into the crisp tartness while a gust of wind raked the grass. Clearview stood in the background, the familiar façade a reminder of all the happiness she’d ever known. This was where she’d learned there was more to life than being a pawn, where she’d found the understanding and support her parents had failed to give her, where she’d discovered her purpose.
“These are excellent,” Griffin said as he bit into his second scone. The clotted cream and jam he’d scooped onto one half of it dripped onto his fingers. “The best I’ve ever had.”
Emily grinned. She’d never seen a man eat with such gusto or with such carefree abandon. It proved that he loved the treat she had made and that piece of knowledge did something funny to her stomach and to her heart.
“Here’s a napkin,” she said, handing him a square of blue cotton.
He accepted the offering with thanks and held it under the scone in order to catch the crumbs.
A pair of swallows darted across the sky, beneath long, filmy clouds giving way to pale blue. The rustling of leaves drew Emily’s attention to a squirrel rummaging for food at the foot of an oak. Emily ate the rest of her apple and stood.
“Stay,” she told Griffin when he made to rise as well. She needed distance from him, the chance to come to terms with the truth humming through her.
Naive, inexperienced woman that she was, she hadn’t thought to protect her heart properly. And now it was too late to do so, because she was already falling hopelessly, madly, and irrevocably in love with him. How could she not when he’d proven how kind he was? When he chose to do for himself what his status and position demanded he have others do for him instead? When he encouraged her to be herself rather than the fabricated version Society asked for?
Emily glanced over her shoulder at where he sat, now conversing amicably with her mother, a woman most unmarried gentlemen tried to avoid because of her boorish manner. But Griffin managed to calm her somehow. In his presence, Georgina was transformed into a less domineering and more understanding person. Which of course was yet another reason to love him.
A smile tugged at her lips as she watched him laugh in response to something her mother said. Emily glanced away from them and gave her attention to the fields beyond the Clearview property where young, bright green wheat swayed happily to and fro. She could still feel his fingers against her skin, teasingly soft and inviting. There was no mistaking what he’d offered, his voice whispering over her skin as he’d stepped even closer, surrounding her with raw masculinity. It was more than a touch and more than a kiss. It was everything she’d ever dreamed of but was now too afraid to accept. He was giving her the chance of a lifetime, and she was now saying no.
She shook her head. If only Cassandra and Mary were here for her to confide in. She desperately needed their guidance in this. But she wouldn’t see either for another week. Not until she arrived at Montvale. A letter from Cassandra informing her of this had arrived yesterday. In it her friend had explained that the children were having a marvelous time in London and that a detour to Clearview on their way to the house party made little sense.
“Your mother suggested I check on you.”
Startled by Griffin’s voice speaking next to her ear, Emily spun to face him. She had not heard him approach and was now momentarily dazed by how handsome he looked with the sun spilling over his hair. It highlighted deep golden strands that weren’t visible when he was indoors.
Expelling her breath slowly, Emily managed to slow the frantic heartbeats he’d caused by catching her off guard. “I’m sure she did,” she said, responding to his comment with an edge of dryness that couldn’t be helped. “Mama has nothing but matchmaking on her agenda.”
“You cannot blame her for that. After all, I am a fine catch.”
His comment, accompanied by waggling eyebrows and a wry smile, prompted her to laugh without hesitation. “The finest there is,” she grinned, “and not the least bit conceited.”
“Is it conceited if it is a fact?”
The twinkle in his eyes eased a knot in her chest that she’d not even realized was there until that exact moment. Bantering with him was one of her favorite activities, not only because it was fun but because she was comfortable with him like this. At least as comfortable as she was with Cassandra and Mary. As long as he wasn’t being seductive and causing her nerves to tangle together.
“I don’t suppose it is, though there is much to be said for being modest.”
“In that case, I should tell you that I would make a terrible match. I’m far too difficult to get along with and not nearly good looking enough for you. People would wonder what on earth you were thinking to marry a man such as me when you can do so much better.”
Although there was humor in his voice as he spoke, Emily couldn’t quite manage the response she knew he was after. “I actually think it would be the other way around. Your popularity in London was undeniable.”
His hand caught her elbow, gripping it tightly as he steered her forward, walking her further away from her mother. “You will not diminish yourself, Emily. Not ever again. Is that clear?”
The fierceness with which he spoke caused her skin to tighten and her chest to contract with surprise. “I thought we agreed to be honest.”
