Groaning in response to the constant discomfort that plagued him, Alistair went to speak with his coachman. He would ensure the carriage was ready for departure before fetching Miss Potter. The anticipation of seeing her again made his muscles flex. Never in his life had he wanted a woman as much as he wanted her.
He’d mentioned marriage on impulse – as a lark, really – not as something he thought she might agree to. Her shocked response followed by her insistence that such a thing would not be possible had not banished the idea from his head, however. Instead, it had cemented itself in a way that demanded his attention. And if he did indeed marry her, then he could have her as often as he pleased and…There was more to it than that. He genuinely enjoyed conversing with her.
An idea struck him. His brother insisted he’d cut him off unless he married the woman who waited for him at Whitehaven. But would Langley really follow through on such a threat if Alistair married Miss Potter instead? And would he care? Was lust enough to make him take such a risk? He could still try to make some investments. He could even sell his country estate if doing so would help him provide for a wife.
Unsure of how far he was willing to go in order to sate his needs, Alistair did what had to be done in order to get ready for the rest of the journey. When Miss Potter came to find him half an hour later, he greeted her with politeness, then handed her up into the carriage and closed the door. She looked out of the window at him and frowned. “Will you not be riding in here with me?”
“Not today,” he said, then went to join his coachman on the driver’s block before she tried to convince him to keep her company instead.
* * *
Alone in the carriage, Louise tried to pass the time with her book. When doing so lost her interest, she gave her attention to the snow-covered landscape. Once this lost its appeal as well, she tried to distract herself with a game of solitaire. By the time luncheon finally arrived, she had to admit this day was turning out to be the longest of her life. It was only made worse by the realization that Lord Alistair wouldn’t be joining her for a meal. Instead, he left her to eat the ham and cheese she’d been served at the inn where they’d stopped, while he remained at the bar, conversing with other travelers.
Vexed, she did her best to remind herself that she was the one who’d denied him, and that if his passions ran as high as he’d suggested, she ought to be grateful to him for adding distance between them. But it was to no avail. The truth was she missed him, and as unwise as spending time in his company might be, she could not ignore the yearning of her heart.
So once she was finished eating, she exited the inn and waited for him to join her outside. “My lord,” she said, drawing his attention, “I’ve purchased the local gazette. Perhaps you would care to read it with me?”
Stopping next to the carriage door, he stared at her. “To do so wouldn’t be wise.” He then extended his hand, offering to help her up.
She remained where she was. “My name is Louise, by the way. In case you were wondering.” And on that note, she climbed up into the carriage without accepting his help.
* * *
Louise.
It was a beautiful name – one that suited her much better than Miss Potter. Still, it was personal and intimate, and after the incident between them the previous evening, it made him wonder about her motive in sharing it with him. One thing was certain, she’d been quite enraged when she’d done so, and while such high emotion ought to have dampened his lust for her, it seemed to have done the opposite. Which was why he found himself telling his coachman that he would ride inside the carriage for the rest of the day, upon which he flung the door open and climbed in after the maddening woman who drove him to want things he’d no business wanting.
Seated in the far corner, she stared at him as he slammed the door and took his seat. He then pinned her with the hardest glare he could manage and asked, “What are you trying to do?”
Her lips parted and she quietly shook her head. “I honestly don’t know. All of this…” she waved her hand between them, “is terribly confusing.”
“Well, it isn’t for me. In fact, my carnal appetite for you is so acute I can scarcely sleep at night or think straight during the day.” He watched her draw in a shuddering breath which only made matters worse. Aggravated, he felt a perverse need to destabilize her, to make her world feel as chaotic as his did right now. “Do you have any idea how uncomfortable it is to be in a state of unfulfilled arousal for several days in a row?” Her eyes widened and she shook her head. “I know it was wrong of me to proposition you last night, I know I must get you to Whitehaven without tossing up your skirts and having you right here in this carriage, but God help me, I’m only a man, so if you keep using your feminine wiles on me – as innocent as you think it may be – I won’t be able to answer for the consequences. Do you understand?”
“I…” She gave a quick nod. “Yes. I understand. I didn’t realize that was what I was doing. I’ve no experience with using feminine wiles, you see.”
Blowing out a tortured breath, he leaned his head back against the squabs as the carriage rolled into motion, jostling him. “Well, you’re quite adept at it, I must say.”
She was quiet for a second, then asked, “In what way?”
Groaning, he rolled his head to the side so he could look across at her. “You’re doing it right now by asking that question.”
“Oh.” Another pause, a twitch of her nose, and a furrowing of her brow, and then, “Ohhhhh…”
The penny had finally dropped.
4
“I’m sorry,” Louise said, for she could think of nothing else to say under the circumstances. One thing was certain, and that was her state of discomfiture, because the things he’d said – the directness of his declaration – had made her squirm. She’d felt a knot form in her belly. Her skin had grown hot, and a needy, unfamiliar ache had begun to swell within her. Even now, her brain felt fuzzy from all the sensations that had collided and made her want things – wicked things – things she could never have without dire consequences. But, oh, it had been tempting to tell him she felt as he did, that she was as susceptible to the stirring of desire, and that resisting temptation was proving to be an unpleasant chore.
But instinct told her doing so would only open the floodgate, and once that happened, they couldn’t go back. So she fought to put an invisible barrier between them and reminded herself that allowing Lord Alistair’s advances would be extremely unwise. Her position was at stake, for heaven’s sake!
So she sat back and stiffened her spine. “It was not my intention to cause you discomfort.” His nostrils flared while he stared back at her. She pressed her fingers into the seat beneath her, steadying her resolve even as her body trembled. “Thank you for being a gentleman. A lesser man would have succumbed to weakness.”
“Yes…well…” He turned his head away as if deliberately blocking her from his view. “You may thank me when you arrive at our destination with your innocence intact. Until then, I would advise you to treat me as you would a prowling lion – with caution and trepidation.”
Sobered by this comment, Louise said nothing in return. She’d had no romantic plans for her future when she’d resolved to become a governess. On the contrary, she’d been quite prepared to sacrifice matrimony and children and passion in favor of doing what was right for her youngest sister. It had been an easy decision to make. She’d had no male acquaintances. Her heart had been free, and she’d known her moment of eligibility had passed. Seeking employment had been the logical step forward for her, and yet now, sitting in this carriage with a man she’d gotten to know so well in such short time – a man who managed to challenge her beliefs while stirring her up inside – she couldn’t help but wish things could be different.
“I didn’t like you at all to begin with,” she found herself saying, when the silence between them became too uncomfortable to bear. Speaking to the passing landscape, she sensed a shift in the air around her and knew without looking that he had turned toward her.
