Gran shook herself a little, snapping out of whatever remembrance she’d fallen into a moment before. “But that’s all over now, and I feel better than I have in years.”
Without warning, I reached forward and crushed Gran in my arms, squeezing tight, no longer worrying about hurting her frail frame. My heart was heavy with regret that I’d kept her at arm’s length these past couple weeks. Yes, losing Gage had been soul-crushing, and I’d be the first to admit I hadn’t been fully in my right mind lately, but this was Gran. My gran. I never should have held her responsible for Arthur and Apollyon’s deeds. It was stupid and selfish of me.
“Oh, Gran, I’m so sorry. Will you forgive me for being so distant lately?” I asked with my face pressed to her shoulder. She rubbed circles on my back like she used to do to calm me down when I was little, and my agony lessened with each rotation.
“Oh, honey, there’s nothing to forgive. I knew you needed some time. But I have missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too,” I managed to croak through my emotions.
Gran held me until tears lined my eyes and I started hiccupping. We both laughed and she pulled back with a smile. “Go sit down, I’ll make you some lemon tea and bring you a spoonful of honey for that hiccup. I have a fresh batch of chocolate chip cookies too.”
Gran might look different on the outside, but she was the same Gran I knew and loved.
“Cookies?” I said and then returned her smile with a wobbly one of my own, and another hiccup. Normally, Gran making cookies in the oven would have sent me into a panic, but now that the curse was broken I was no longer afraid of her burning the house down.
Gran chuckled and shooed me over to the same bistro table that had been in our last apartment, the one Drea and I had set up in here a few weeks ago. I ran my fingers over the table, remembering how many meals Gran and I had shared on it and smiled. I was holding my breath, trying to get rid of my hiccups, when she returned a few minutes later. The tea tray she held was loaded with a teapot, two teacups, a plate of cookies, a spoonful of honey, and a small silver key. I popped the honey-covered spoon in my mouth, sucking the sticky sweetness off as I stared at the key. It was short and the teeth were a bit blocky with a deep notch in the middle. The top half was chunky black plastic. It looked familiar, but I couldn’t say why. I also didn’t know why she’d put it on the tea tray of all places.
“What’s that?” I asked, blessedly hiccup free.
Gran pushed the key across the table toward me. “That is yours,” she said.
“Umm, thanks? What’s it for?” Gran was being cryptic and even though I knew she wasn’t cursed anymore I worried about whether or not she was making sense.
She snatched up a cookie, taking a bite. “I’ve held on to that key for years. Arthur’s curse prevented me from telling you about it or giving it to you, although I tried many times.”
That’s why it was familiar. It was always hanging from Gran’s keychain. I’m sure I asked her about it at some point, but never got a straight answer.
I picked it up, turning it over in my hand. I ran my thumb over the teeth and then flipped it over, noticing that there weren’t any markings on the metal. Gran had possessed it so long; I’d barely given it a second thought. Since she was giving it to me now, I assumed it opened something special and she wasn’t just handing down a keepsake.
I glanced back at her, waiting for her to go on.
“Your mother gave that to me the last day I saw her. It goes to a safety-deposit box downtown. I was supposed to give it to you when you turned thirteen, but of course I couldn’t, due to the curse.” She took a deep breath, and I leaned back in my chair.
My mom. It felt like a blade stabbed my heart then. That key was another reminder of what my obsessive portal watching had stopped me from doing. I should have been preparing for my mom’s rescue, but Gage’s loss hit me so hard I’d put it out of my mind. Staring down at the key I thought about how many years Gran had held on to it and I was flooded with regret over not making my mom a priority.
I heaved a sigh, and even the breath in my lungs felt heavy.
A safety-deposit box? I wondered what was inside. I looked back up at her trying to keep an open mind and take in everything Gran was saying.
“Tatum, your mother knew the day she dropped you off with me that she may not be coming back. She didn’t tell me that in so many words, and I didn’t realize it at the time, but looking back I can clearly see she left that day with a mission. One she wasn’t confident she’d accomplish. I don’t know what it was, and it’s apparent now that the whole car accident was just a cover-up for whatever really happened to her, but I think you may find some more answers in whatever she put in that safety-deposit box.”
“You don’t have any idea what she left me?” I asked.
Gran shook her head. “After her accident I tried to access it, hoping to find out if it led to any clues as to why she left in a rush. But it’s in your name and they wouldn’t let me. I would have brought this to you earlier, but I just remembered it this morning. There are some memories that the curse stole from me that are still coming back in bits and pieces. Some things are still scrambled. I have the name and address of the bank though, so you can go check whenever you’re ready.”
Holy crap.Excitement and nervousness thrummed through me in equal measure. I was torn between jumping out of my seat and running to find out what my mom left me, and staying glued where I was, terrified I’d find out something even worse about myself.
“Thanks, Gran,” I said, and then reached across the table to squeeze her hand.
The indecision I felt must have been splashed across my face, because Gran set down her half-eaten cookie and grabbed my other hand. She waited until she had my full attention to speak. “I know that finding out about Apollyon being your father was a shock. I can’t tell you how much I wish I could have prepared you for all of this sooner.” She waved her hand indicating the room, but what she really meant was all the Watcher stuff. “And I know you’re probably feeling a little insecure about it all, but I want you to know that you are still you. It doesn’t matter who your parents may be. You are still Tatum Powers, the strong and compassionate girl I raised. That was true last month, and it’s true today. No matter what you’ve learned in the last month, or what secrets you might uncover with that key, nothing will ever change who you are.”
She’d hit the nail on the head. That was exactly what I was apprehensive about. I might be a full-fledged Lumen, but there were still pieces of Apollyon living inside me. Even Cael had said only I had specific abilities to defeat Apollyon, and I was smart enough to understand what he meant by that.
I so badly wanted to believe Gran was right, that I was still me no matter what, but what if she was wrong? What if the same darkness that festered in Apollyon’s dark heart lived in mine too?
* * *
Later that day, I shoveled food into my mouth during lunch as I prepared for my advanced portal making independent study with Aurelia. I’d pushed the key Gran had given me and whatever possible Pandora’s box it would unlock out of my mind until I could deal with it after school. And I’d shoved all things Gage-related into another impenetrable box and closed the lid. I’m sure there were healthier ways to deal with my emotions, but I didn’t have time to move through the stages of grief like a normal person. So instead, I squeezed Gage into a corner of my heart and put a barrier around him so I could focus on preparing myself to take on Apollyon and the horrors of the Netherworld in order to save my mom.
