Countless moments ingrained in the grass, the trees, the air. Moments of laughter, of fun, of hope, and kindness, and affection.
And a single one of agony.
Anna tilted her head back and swallowed around the tightness in her throat. It was no math. An entire childhood of happiness shouldn’t have been wiped away by a flicker of time.
They’d been friends once. A relationship that had defined her for so long.
And a friendship that she’d mourned longer than she would admit out loud.
To bind herself to him, to start this marriage off right, to allow trust to grow between them once again; one of them would have to take that next step.
Phantom fingers pressed into her skin, tainting her, holding her back where no one else could see.
Trust. The boy she knew. The man before her.
Trust.
Live the rest of her life holding on to the past.
Trust.
Or brave a new future.
“I’m ready,” she said, the rightness of the two words easing the weight across her shoulders. At his hesitant expression, she stepped close and tipped back her head so he would see the certainty in her eyes. “Let’s start again.”
Want—she dared call it—longingflashed across his face. He reached out a hand, but it stopped short of her cheek.
She clasped his fingers and placed them where they belonged. “I have held on to the past too long.” Anger wouldn’t see her to a happy future or help her find her brother. “I will attempt to be an easy wife—”
“Don’t threaten me,” Jackson said, his expression bright—alive—and his tone playful. “Here, I thought you were calling a truce.”
She huffed. “We both know I’ll most likely make a hash of it. Me docile? Obedient? I’m more likely to skin my knees and inadvertently insult a monarch.”
“I’m already set on wedding you, Miss Greene. You need not proclaim your many amiabilities for my benefit.”
She huffed again, his unconditional acceptance splitting the wall around her heart from top to bottom. “Take this seriously, Duke.”
“I’ve always taken you seriously. No matter the threatened diplomatic incident.”
“But—” Anna licked her lips, the rush of uncertainty and self-consciousness too humiliating to acknowledge. Worrying over another person’s opinion wasn’t her. And yet she did not wish to enter the chapel without his honest one. “Once we say our vows, there’s no undoing this. We will be bound together for the rest of our lives. You will be stuck with me.” There were things she must tell him, for him to prepare in case of the worst happening, but trust wasn’t so easy, after all. If she told him everything, about her family—
He snorted. “I’ve six properties totaling thousands of acres. We’ll hardly be forced to stay in the same county, let alone attached at the hip.”
Public estrangement would make things easier, except . . .
“Is that what you wish?” she asked, her belly growing tight. A week ago, she’d have agreed without a thought. “Do you want us to live separate lives?”
Some emotion played across his face, fleeting and hard to grasp. But when his gaze caught hers, the careful mask he wore was gone. “I would not waste another day without you in my life.”
That wall around her heart crumbled into nothing, but Anna didn’t fear the fall of her defenses this time.
They would start again.
They would learn to be friends as adults... as husband and wife.
The war would continue, but, this time—God willing—they’d fight on the same side.
And he need never know of the shadows haunting her past.
