I can’t bring myself to look away even though I should. Theo sits down on the floor, uncaring about wrinkling his suit as he takes a figurine from Oscar, who begins talking animatedly. Theo smiles, quietly taking him in, which makesmesmile. I wipe the tears from my face and head to the kitchen, knowing I need to give them some time to bond.
“What do you mean Optimus Prime dies?” Oscar yells from the other room just as I’m putting the finishing touches on dinner. “I don’t believe you. He’sOptimus Prime.”
I glance up to see Oscar storming into the kitchen. “It’s not true, is it, Mom?”
Theo’s hot on his heels, his face a mixture of mortification and horror.
Standing up, my gaze darts from Oscar to Theo. “No lies, remember?” I ask, prompting Oscar to nod and brace himself for the inevitable. “He does. But… he comes back to life.”
Oscar's face lights up as he gushes, “Really?”
“Yes, really.” I laugh, tousling his hair. “Go wash up, dinner's ready.”
He bounds out of the kitchen, and Theo steps toward me, panic written across his face. “Oh fuck. I’m so sorry. I had no clue. I’m the worst parent ever. I nearly broke his heart.”
“Theo, honey. It’s okay. You didn’t know he hadn’t watched them. I was waiting for him to get a bit older first. Sometimes you have to be the bad parent to keep them safe. You’ll get there. Please stop worrying so much.”
“Why is this so hard?” he murmurs, his eyes cast down.
“Because it's not something you're used to. You’ll get there. Don’t forget, he’s been with me since the day he was born, and I still get it wrong.” I chuckle. “Come on, let’s have dinner.”
He nods before taking a seat at the table, and Oscar comes running back in to sit in his usual spot. I pick up the dinner plates and put them in front of them. “Sorry, it’s not much. I haven’t had a chance to go grocery shopping this week,” I murmur, my cheeks flushing.
Theo places a hand on my arm. “This looks great, thank you.” The sincerity in his eyes tells me he means it, and my heart warms at his praise. I move away, taking my own seat and tucking into the pasta.
Both of them eat like they haven’t been fed in days. I smile, noticing they both eat the same way—mixing all the spaghetti with the sauce, then twirling it around on their fork. Oscar always said I was strange for cutting it up into small pieces, but the thought of slurping my pasta makes me feel nauseous.
Theo finally breaks the silence. “What do you have planned for your birthday, little dude?”
“Dunno. Whatever Mom decides to do,” he replies around a mouthful of food.
“Oscar! Manners,” I scold, an eyebrow raised.
He gives me a sheepish look as he apologizes. “Sorry.”
“To be honest, I hadn’t thought that far ahead,” I admit. “I’ve been so focused on this case it’s flown out of my mind.” I feel awful saying it out loud, but it’s the truth. I’m only human.
“One of my friends had a Marvel-themed party in his backyard. All the superheroes turned up, and he had the biggest cake ever,” Oscar says enthusiastically. “Can I have a party like that?” He glances at me with big doe eyes, and I hate to say no.
“I’d love to say yes, bud, but we don’t have the room here, and I don’t know anyone with a big enough garden.”
Theo clears his throat. “If it's okay, I have someone who can help with that.”
“Are you sure?” I ask, not wanting to put him on the spot.
“Absolutely. We’ll talk more when little dude has gone to bed,” he says, smiling.
Oscar turns to his dad, returning his smile. “I like that nickname.”
“Good,” Theo replies, ruffling his hair. “I happen to like calling you it.”
We finish with dinner, and then Theo helps me clean up my small kitchen. Oscar ran off as soon as we were done. I set rules in place for him—he keeps his bedroom tidy and toys neatly in the living room, and I deal with the kitchen. I tend to get worried he might hurt himself with a knife or scissors, so I prefer for him to stay out.
I wash up the dishes as Theo dries. We work in comfortable silence, our hands brushing every so often. It feels nice. Domesticated and not something I would ever associate with him. He’s never struck me as the type of guy to want a family and a home, but in some weird way, it suits him.
I can feel his attention on me as I work, but I’m too scared to look. Too afraid to get lost in those eyes of his. Putting boundaries in place with a man I once loved more than anything else in the world seems hard to do. My body sure as hell wants him, but my mind is screaming,beware. He hurt us once, and he can do it again.
His body brushes up behind me, his breath hot on my neck, and I let out a sigh. His cologne scents the air around him, and I relax back into him.
