Tomorrow I would sign the contract. I would lock myself into five more years of this carefully controlled life. I would become the captain they wanted me to be—stable and focused and controversy-free.
I would be the man who had chosen fear over love.
I closed my eyes. I tried not to think about the look on Theo’s face when he had asked if he was just a hookup. I tried not to think about the distance I’d created between us, cold and widening like a crack in the ice.
I tried not to think about how much easier it would be if I’d never let myself fall for him in the first place.
But it was too late for that.
I’d already fallen.
I just didn't have the courage to let him catch me.
9
Theo
The equipment room smelled like stale sweat, sharp enough to burn the back of my throat.
I stood in the doorway. I watched Luca unlace his skates methodically, like nothing had happened. Like the last three days hadn't been radio silence punctuated by clipped instructions during drills.
Like he hadn't told me he was falling for me and then disappeared.
"We need to talk." My voice came out steadier than I felt.
Luca’s hands stilled on the laces. "Callahan. Not here."
"Where, then? Your place? Oh wait—you won't answer my texts." I stepped inside and let the door swing shut behind me. The click of the latch felt final. "Three days, Luca. Three days of nothing."
He pulled off his skate with more force than necessary. "I’ve been busy."
"Bullshit."
That got his attention. His head snapped up. Those dark eyes met mine for the first time since the morning after. The morning after he had touched me like I mattered, kissed me like he meant it, told me things that cracked his armor wide open.
Then his agent called and everything changed.
"Watch your tone." The captain voice. Cold and distant.
"Or what? You’ll bench me? Ignore me harder?" I moved closer, letting my gear bag hit the floor with a thud. "I’m done being patient. I’m done pretending everything is fine when you look through me during practice."
Luca’s jaw tightened. He set his skate down carefully, like he was afraid of what might happen if he wasn't perfectly controlled. "This isn't the time."
"Then when?" My hands curled into fists at my sides. "After another midnight visit when you’re desperate enough? After you’ve convinced yourself I’m just—what did you call it—a distraction?"
Something flickered across his face. Pain. Guilt. But it vanished so fast I might have imagined it.
"Your father called." The words spilled out before I could stop them. "That's what this is about, isn't it? Him and your agent and that contract meeting tomorrow."
Luca stood abruptly. "You don't know what you’re talking about."
"Don't I?" I closed the distance between us, stopping just short of touching. Close enough to see the shadows under his eyes, the tension in his shoulders, the way his hands trembled before he shoved them in his pockets. "You told me about being fourteen. About what happened when you came out. About building walls so high nobody could see the real you."
"Stop." The word cracked.
"About falling for me." My voice dropped. "Was that a lie?"
"Theo..."
