As always, she sneaks quietly into my room, coming and going around Perlington House as she pleases. And since she’s wearing a hoodie and sweatpants, I know she’s slipped away again to spend the night with me.
“I came as quickly as I could,” she murmurs, and I scoot over so she can climb into bed with me. She rolls onto her side so we can look at each other.
“I didn’t know. I didn’t know what he was planning.” Her eyes reflect so many emotions. Regret, worry, sadness, fear.
Do mine look the same?
“I know. It’s not your fault. Henry orchestrated all of this. He would’ve ensured the contract went through despite Phil’s death. None of it is your fault. None of it.” And that’s the bitter truth. There’s no one to blame for my situation. Because I agreed to marry Harlington’s heir. Even if it was already a done deal.
I had always assumed it would be Philipp, but now I know differently.
“I’m so sorry, Lia. Really. I know that you and Nic…” She winces as she sees me flinch at his name.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean… ugh… I don’t even know what to say,” she sighs, sitting up. I follow suit, letting out a sigh of my own.
“You don’t have to say anything, really. I’ll handle it. Somehow.” And I mean it.
Lizzy raises a skeptical eyebrow, studying me closely.
“Really? Because if I remember it correctly, you wouldn’t exactly roll out the red carpet for Nic.”
She puts it lightly, and my lips twitch just a little.
“No, I wouldn’t, and I won’t. But I can adapt, and most importantly, I can avoid him. Somehow, it’ll work.” The thought of spending so much time with Nicolas in the future makes my stomach drop, but I don’t let Lizzy see it, who still looks at me with deep skepticism and concern.
“I’d like to see you try that when you’re living with him and dealing with all the events and public appearances. Trust me, it’ll be damn hard to avoid my brother.” She looks at me intently, nodding in emphasis, and I have to stifle a laugh at her almost manic expression.
“Trust me, I’ll find a loophole. I can and I will. And if worst comes to worst, he’ll see that I’m not as prudish and innocent as he thinks.” I grin crookedly, and Lizzy’s eyebrows shoot up.
“If you say so. But seriously, I know Nic. He’s not as bad as he pretends to be.”
Now it’s my eyebrows that go up, and she waves a hand.
“Okay, okay, he’s as bad as he pretends to be. But he has a good heart. Phil idolized him,” she tries to reassure me again, but it doesn’t help.
“You do too, even though he treats you like crap. Thank you for trying to make this easier for me. But in this case, I can only help myself.”
Lizzy looks at me seriously again and nods.
“Yes, that’s true. But you’re the strongest person I know. You’ll get through this. And you’ll be a wonderful wife to my brother. Even if he resists it every step of the way. But if he hurts you, he’ll have me to answer to. Period.”
And even though that threat would likely just make Nicolas laugh, it means the world to me. My heart feels a little lighter, and as I sink back into my pillow with Lizzy snuggling up to me, I feel a small sense of security. I tuck this feeling away like a treasure in my heart. My eyelids grow heavy, and I finally fall into a deep, dreamless sleep.
The next morning, Lizzy is gone, leaving a note that she’ll meet me in the library this afternoon. So, I decide to go for a walk.
Just as I’m pulling a shirt over my head, there’s a brisk knock at the door, and my brother bursts into the room without waiting for me to answer.
“The queen wants to see you. You’re to appear at the palace in an hour.” He looks me over from head to toe, his gaze full of disapproval.
“And put on something more acceptable. You look like you just stepped off of the streets.” He sneers at my shirt and jeans, and deep within me, something begins to boil. Darkly, intensely.My hand clenches into a fist, then releases, and I breathe in and out, in and out. Over and over. The anger and hatred simmer, and I know that if I ever let this rage rise to the surface, nothing will be able to save me. So, I take a deep breath, shove these feelings back into a locked drawer, and close it tightly.
“Good morning to you too. And thanks for asking, I’m fine,” I respond sarcastically before I can hold back. Henry’s gaze instantly darkens, and I instinctively step back. A flash of regret crosses his eyes, but it doesn’t reach me.
“Don’t be childish, Amelia. We need to present our best selves. This connection to the royal family is important. Very important.” My heart fractures again at his words, which contradict the fleeting expression in his eyes. Inwardly, I scold myself—why do I keep hoping he’ll change?
Because you love him, my ever-wise inner voice reminds me, and I close my eyes briefly, breathing in and out. Saying anything now would be pointless. So my frustration doesn’t fade. Because it’s useless.
“Tell Winston I’ll be ready to leave in half an hour.” Without sparing him another glance, I turn and slip into the bathroom. Away from him, away from the hatred he stokes, the despair he drives me toward.
