His emotions are locked away. Any discernment of what he’s feeling is reliant on my over-analyzation of his every move.
Why does he have to look so good?
He clears his throat. “Thank you all for being here on such short notice. I know some of you have been wondering when I may take my place as your alpha. I’ve come to tell you all that day will be soon, as I have found your luna. And she is here today.”
Eager whispers and glances are exchanged amongst the crowd.
Tyler signals for the pack to be quiet and listen.
The delusional part of me is hoping he’ll say my name, but that’s just wishful thinking.
Sam and Taya join me. Taya gives me a sympathetic smile and pats my hand. She knows and always has.
Caleb holds out his hand to the door behind him and Medein enters and takes it. “I present to you, your soon-to-be luna, Medein Rosa the fourth.”
The crowd cheers—thrilled to have a powerful witch to lead them. Who wouldn’t be?
She kisses his cheek, and my heart stops. While I know it’s all for show, my heart doesn’t. Medein kissed him. That’s all I can see.
I turn to Taya. “I can’t do this.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, it’s too painful. I’ll catch you all later.”
“Wait, we’re about to leave. We’ll walk with you.”
“Thank you, but I’m okay. I could use some time alone.”
They accept my polite rejection, and I weave through the crowd to exit. Every so often, I look at Caleb. It’s like a car crash. I can’t look away. I know that’s the masochist in me. When I reach the doorway, I make the mistake of allowing myself one more, final glance. That’s when I meet Caleb’s gaze head on.
Regret, anguish and yearning crash into me. And I send longing, jealousy, and my heartache back his way.
He stares at me longer than I think Medein would be okay with. Neither of us can tear our eyes away. That’s why I’m thankful when someone grabs Caleb’s shoulder to congratulate him.
I’m gone before he can look back.
I need air.
With my tail between my legs, I pout all the way back to Jemma’s.
I climb into bed. I can already feel the onset of a deep depression. Sinking into the feeling under the covers, I cry myself to sleep.
Chapter FIFTY-TWO
Caleb
Every instinct I have was telling me to comfort Jay, to claim her. Her presence made it hard for me to think. And if I can’t think, I can’t lead.
How can someone be both my strength and my weakness? How can one person hold so much power and be responsible for my very breath?
I can’t fight it anymore—I have to make sure Jay’s okay. I wanted to comfort her at the event, but the moment I’d have her in my arms, I wouldn’t be able to let go. She’s stronger than me in that way.
When she turned her back to me and ran out of the room, my predator instincts activated. I force myself to wait until the announcement is over, but then I give in to them—chasing her like prey.
I don’t want to let her go.
I charge up the three steps and swing myself around the door frame and down the hall, out the door, keeping Jay’s scent locked in.
