Is that what I would be doing if I joined the hunt? Would I be settling?
“To each their own, though. People have their reasons for choosing to mate—valid reasons. It’s just that none of them applied to me. I didn’t feel like I had to have pups. I raised ’Laina and trust me, she was no picnic.” Jemma snorts. “I like my life and wouldn’t mind sharing it, but I don’t feel any less fulfilled in my own company.”
“I know you raised the queen, but why did she get placed under your care?”
“Laina’s mother, Emilia, was a rogue. Like you. She came here seeking asylum. Alpha Jack allowed her to stay if she agreed to rehabilitate and join Bloodhound as a pack member after her probation. I took her in.”
I caught thewas.
“What happened to her?”
“She died giving birth.”
“But Alaina had her father, right?”
“She knew King Ash for a short time. Less than a year. She didn’t really know him. Her father just passed recently. King Ash. Colin killed him.”
I wince.How much destruction did he cause?
Maybe Alaina and I have more in common than I thought. I assumed that, with her being queen, she probably lived this fantastical and lavish lifestyle. It sounds like she was just as alone as I was—at least until she found her mate.
Does that mean there’s hope for me?
“Is she happy?” I ask, hopeful.
“She’s the happiest I’ve ever seen her. Dax coming for her at the Hunt was the best thing to ever happen to that girl. She was against the idea of going to another pack at first, I know she wanted to stay here.”
“Why?”
Who wouldn’t want to live at a castle and be royalty?
“I know it might be hard to believe, but it can be just as uncomfortable having things as it is to not have things.”
“How so?”
“It’s scary to have something to lose. Something someone can take. Someone who can leave. Part of the reason Laina struggled so much to let Dax in was her fear that he wouldn’t stay if she did... and I guess it’s also because Bloodhound was all she’d ever known. And all she ever thought things would be. Change and taking a leap of faith is hard. But now she wouldn’t change what she found at Crescent pack for the world.”
“What did she find?”
Jemma looks at me and smiles softly. “Family.”
Her story gives me hope. Jemma doesn’t know it, but it’s exactly what I needed to hear. I’ve been a rogue practically my entire life. I’ve been kept, had, used and discarded. It’s always been me versus the world. Choosing a different path for myself is scary but also thrilling.
I could choose to be more. I could have more. I could have a mate, a pack and a family all my own if I choose to attend the Hunt. But that would mean giving up Caleb.
Am I prepared to do that?
Chapter FIFTY-ONE
Jay
The next day, everyone in Bloodhound is called for an impromptu town hall meeting. No one seems to know what’s going on.
We all filter into a room that feels much smaller than when I was a prisoner, but that might just be my anxiety talking. The lights are bright, and it’s hot, and everyone is murmuring. It’s sending me into sensory overload.
Tyler is at the front of the room ordering everyone to quiet.
I can barely see over the crowd, but as soon as Caleb stands, nothing can obstruct my view. He scans the people, and I’m thankful I’m in the very back and practically dwarfed by everyone. From here, I can watch him without him seeing me—though I still hope he’s looking.
