“I have a theory,” she says.
“What?”
“If you’ve never been in a committed relationship, your sexual partners—which you barely know—aren’t going to tell you what they like. They’re not going to say, ‘Right here, it’s right here! I know it’s not where you thought it was, but it’s true, it’sRIGHT…HERE!’ ” She points to her crotch and continues. “ ‘Look, honey, I can bend over in front of you and it still works,’ or like, ‘You can put your mouth on that!’ ” She’s laughing almost to tears now and I am too. We’re officially drunk.
“I know. He needs GPS directions. I mean, the last time we were together I tried to turn around, but he flipped me over onto my back and just started the old heave-ho. I think he knows, he just doesn’t care. It’s like going to the gym for him.”
She’s still giggling. “That sounds amazing,” she says, rolling her eyes.
“I guess I took some things for granted.”
“Like what?”
I’m not thinking before I speak. I’m really out of it. We’re not even adding a splash of juice now. “Like the fact that in four minutes Alex could make me—” I stop myself.
Her smile turns from humorous to sympathetic. “You taught him well.”
“Somebody else is probably enjoying the fruits of my labor as we speak,” I say with one last little laugh. “A kid-cancer doctor, angel, model, perfect specimen…”
“Don’t think about that,” she says. “Everyone’s different anyway. Alex is probably fumbling his way through uncomfortable experiences too.”
“No, he’s not,” I say with a seriousness that is giving me a stomachache. “He wasalwaysgood at it.”
After about three hours of laughing, drinking, and then trying to sober up, we ask for the check.
“My massage appointment is at five and I want to check in first. I better get going. What are you gonna do for an hour?” she asks.
“Go walk on the beach…think about things.”
We stand and start to head out of the restaurant, when Aliciaturns to me and says, “You’re divorced, Dani. You’re single and you don’t have to be a mom…now is the time for cocaine and threesomes.”
“One never stops being a mom.”
“You know what I mean.”
“I’ll be fine. I know he likes me. I am a relationship person. I don’t want that other stuff.”
We hug. She pulls away and says, “It’s not so much about you not wanting it, it’s about the way the world is. The world you haven’t been a part of for more than two decades has changed.”
“Okay, Lish. Ihearyou!” I give her a kiss on the cheek, say goodbye, and head for the boardwalk.
Before I know it, it’s almost five and I’m walking into the restaurant to meet Jacob. I feel a bit windblown and disheveled, so I pop into the ladies’ room first and clean myself up. Perfume, breath mint, and five Advils later, I head out to the front of the tiny seafood spot where I see Jacob standing against a pillar. Before he sees me, I take a moment to take him in. It’s the first time I’ve really looked at him from a distance.
I wonder, if I didn’t know him, would I be attracted to him? He’s in great shape, but he kind of has one of those faces that’s easy to forget.
He looks up, sees me, and smiles instantly. His eyes light up as he walks toward me.He likes me.I repeat the words over and over in my head.
“Hi, lovely.” He leans down and kisses me on the cheek.
“Hi.” I know there are things I want to say, but I’m holding my tongue for the moment. “You look like you got some sun.”
“Yeah, a lot of sun,” he says with a laugh. “Table’s this way. Shall we?”
I’m reading into his response. Why did he laugh? It’s irking me. I need to get it off my chest.
As soon as we sit down, I start in. “So, Costa Rica?”
“Yeah. You ever been?”
